


No. 2

by buffalo1221



Category: KROLO, Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-05
Updated: 2015-10-09
Packaged: 2018-04-25 00:26:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4939660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buffalo1221/pseuds/buffalo1221
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ashlyn is getting tired of always feeling like second in line behind Hope Solo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Think I Like...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you I'd be back :) 
> 
> I'm well aware that this concept is crazy, but the idea wouldn't go away so I figured I'd just go with it. This will be much shorter than my other works, probably less than 10 chapters. It won't always be pretty so feel free to expel your excitement, anger, discontent, etc with me ;) 
> 
> Let's have some fun!

Her whole body was wracked in nerves as she twirled the string of her U.S. Soccer issued hoodie around her fingers. She couldn’t sit still, couldn’t fight the butterflies that had settled into the pit of her stomach. Whit reached over and placed her hand gently on the blonde’s bouncing knee, her eyes glaring at her in an attempt to settle to boisterous goalkeeper down.

“Ash, will you just relax?” she asked in a slightly irked tone as she pulled her hand off the blonde’s muscled thigh and picked back up the magazine she was reading on the hotel bed next to her. 

Ashlyn sighed and pushed off the bed. She was too excited to be lying down anyways and for once Whitney’s laid back attitude wasn’t having the usual calming effect on her. If anything it was making her more anxious and she tried to focus her mind away from a certain defender as she stared out of their hotel room overlooking Los Angeles. It was a beautiful city in so many different ways and Ashlyn smiled at the thought that it was about to get even more beautiful when a flight from Germany landed at LAX with a certain brunette on it. “It feels different this time, Whit,” she finally got out, her hands pressing against the warm glass of their balcony door as her eyes continued to rake across the LA skyline. “She told me she has something important to tell me.”

“And you think that means…” Whitney replied, glancing up at the blonde over the top of her Cosmopolitan magazine. They’ve been over this so many times and she’s trying to hold back so as not to build Ashlyn up. It wouldn’t be the first time that the blonde thought Ali was coming back from Germany and was going to finally confess her love.

A sigh escaped Ashlyn’s lips at her friend’s dismissal and she yanked open the door and stepped onto the warm concrete balcony. She didn’t bother to shut the door knowing that Whitney would follow after her out shortly whether she wanted her to or not. Sure enough, a minute later as she was leaning on her forearms on the steel railing of the upscale hotel balcony, she heard shuffling behind her.

“Why do you think this time is different, Ash?” she asked, her tone now only holding a slight amount of skepticism. If there was one thing she learned about her best friend after all the years, it was that Ashlyn wore her heart on her sleeve. She was fearless with her emotions and always blunt and to the point, except when it came to one person –Alexandra Krieger. Though she was always absolutely genuine around the defender, she had never been able to confess her feelings. Whether it was fear of rejection, fear of acceptance, fear that she might ruin everything they had built or fear that she could lose Ali forever, they’d never been able to tell.

_Ali is gorgeous inside and out. Ali is brave and fearless on the field and off. Ali is an amazing friend, compassionate and loyal to a fault. Ali is straight._

Those were the things that Ashlyn knew to be true regarding her best friend, but lately she could almost sense a shift. Their calls would last later into the night, Ali’s voice would become softer and raspier as if she was no longer putting up a front, but showing her raw, true self. Ali seemed happier. She was freer with herself, with her smile, her flirtatious words, her clothing choices and the way she carried herself. It was almost as if she was a new person, a person that Ashlyn saw change over the course of several months via Skype and a person that she couldn’t wait to see face to face to witness the change with her own eyes.

Part of her hoped, actually most of her hoped that the self-professed ‘soul searching’ the brunette had been doing while in Germany had led her to a certain conclusion.

_Ali is not completely straight. Ali is in love with Ashlyn Harris._

Those are the slight changes she was hoping to see in the brunette when she finally wrapped her up in her arms this camp. It was a long shot, but she honestly couldn’t think of anything else that Ali would be so excited about telling her.

“I just feel it, Whit. This time, this camp is different. Hope is just back from her injury leaving the door open for me to beat her out and Ali…I don’t know but I feel like something is different with her. This is going to be my camp.” Her voice was assured and confident and she honestly believed the words to be true.

Whit turned and smiled at her friend. The bright sun was reflecting off her face which would be radiating with blissful hope regardless of the sun. She set her hand on top of Ashlyn’s for a moment and nodded slowly. “Alright, Ash.” She watched the blonde’s attention flutter away as she dug through her pocket and pulled out her cell phone which had just vibrated. Her smile stretched across her face, growing impossibly wider as she read the contents of the text message she had received.

“Just landed!” she shrieked as her eyes lit up. “I’m going to go pick her up before team dinner!” She crammed her phone back into the pocket of her mesh black Nike shorts before pulling Whit into a tight hug. “Wish me luck!” she called out over her shoulder, but Whit barely had a chance to respond before the door to their hotel room was slamming shut.

For the entire fifteen minute drive to the airport Ashlyn kept both hands wrapped firmly around the leather steering wheel of the team van. While she hadn’t necessarily envisioned the talk happening in a rented mini-van, she figured it was better than nothing. Besides, after not seeing Ali for months, she’s pretty sure the last thing the brunette would be studying is the vehicle she picked her up in. She was in her favorite cut-off shirt which showed off her toned muscles and the new tattoo she had gotten a few weeks back, with the Ray bans Ali had gotten her for her birthday and the blue and red Hurley snapback she always complimented her on and often tried to steal for her own pictures. She glanced in the mirror checking herself over a final time until a horn blared behind her and she realized that the light had turned green a few seconds before.

The white, massive LAX sign rose from the side of the road to her right and she felt her heart clench at the implication that she was so close to Ali. She tried to pull in a few deep breaths, but didn’t find the technique helpful, instead deciding to open the windows and let some fresh air into the car. She steered that car into the lane with the ARRIVALS sign hanging over it and pulled up to the curb. Her fingers would not stop fiddling and she kept glancing at her phone waiting for a text. She was so intently focused on the screen of her phone, a picture of her and Ali in Germany as the backdrop that she didn’t even see anyone approaching the car.

She shot into the air, almost hitting her head on the ceiling when the driver’s side door was yanked open. Even though she had settled firmly back onto the seat, it still felt like she was floating on air when a strong pair of arms wrapped tightly around her and a familiar scent flooded her mind. Her head buried into the brunette’s neck and she took in a deep breath, letting Ali’s scent permeate into her senses. “God I missed you,” she sighed, squeezing the defender tighter to her body.

“I missed you too, Ash,” Ali confessed honestly, pulling back to meet her eyes. Ashlyn saw something different in the cinnamon irises, a different fire behind her eyes than had previously existed and her smiles grew almost imperceptibly bigger at the possible reasons behind it.

“Well let’s get you back to the hotel so you can get all pretty for dinner,” she teased, letting her eyes follow Ali around the front of the car. She gulped as they swept up the defender’s toned legs which were hugged tightly by her multi-colored Nike tights, the same tights that Ali had modeled for her via Skype when her Fall Nike sponsorship package had arrived. She surmised that they looked even better in person, as did the blue and white quarter-zip that hugged her in all the right places.

Ali tossed her suitcase into the backseat of the van before hopping into the frost passenger seat. “I take offense to that, Harris,” she said with a hint of sass while pushing her sunglasses down from the top of her head to cover her eyes from the glare of the setting Los Angeles sun. “I think I look pretty right now, don’t you?”

The words are laced with something that Ashlyn can’t quite decipher and for some reason Ali seemed so much more comfortable with their normal flirty banter that they passed back and forth so easily. It wasn’t that it necessarily made her uncomfortable before, but for once Ashlyn could sense a deeper level of flirtation in her voice and the way her hand lingered longer than normal on her knee when she playfully chastised her. “Oh yes. So beautiful,” Ashlyn finally replied when she was able to pull her thoughts from how beautiful she honestly looked despite the jetlag and countless hours she had just spent on a flight from Germany.

They spent the first few minutes catching up. Ashlyn told Ali about the first day of camp which she had missed for a game and filled her in on all of the juicy gossip regarding everyone’s personal lives so that she wouldn’t feel left out. “Hope finally dumped that guy she was seeing too,” she finished with, not necessarily wanting to bring the conversation to her friendly rival because she knew Ali would press another matter, but she was honestly surprised when Ali nodded and casually said she had already known about the breakup and that she had been talking with Hope recently. Ashlyn didn’t think much of it though as she continued on, honestly just glad that Ali didn’t start drilling her about the current goalkeeper order. “So tell me about you,” she asked when she had finished catching Ali up on everything and everyone. “You seem…different,” she added, hoping to get to the discussion Ali had wanted to have earlier. She knew it probably should have waited for a better time since they were almost back at the hotel, but she honestly couldn’t wait anymore.

The question seemed to catch Ali a bit off-guard and she sat back in her seat. Ashlyn watched as her chest rose and fell a few times while she took deep breaths. “I…I’m doing really well actually,” she finally said and turned to meet Ashlyn’s eyes with a wide grin. “I’ve been talking to Kyle a lot and working through some things.”

“Oh yeah?” Ashlyn replied, her eyebrow peaking in interest as she pulled up at a stop light a few miles from their hotel. Ali nodded and her eyes fluttered to the window as if she couldn’t face Ashlyn when she admitted her secret. “Hey, Alex,” she said softly to pull Ali from her thoughts and placed her hand on Ali’s which was resting on her thigh. “You can talk to me about anything.”

The light turned green and Ashlyn reluctantly pulled forward, hoping that the rest of the ones in front of her would turn red and prolong their drive. She could tell that Ali was on the brink of confessing something, but unfortunately they pulled into the driveway of the hotel before she got the courage. A disheartened Ash was about to get out of the van, when she felt a firm hand clamp down on her leg.

“I’m not straight, Ashlyn.”

The blunt words made Ashlyn’s eyes go wide and she turned to meet Ali’s sheepish grin with what she assumed could only have been a look of pure shock. Though those were the words she had been hoping to hear for over a year, she couldn’t believe she was actually hearing them. “What?” she whispered in shock, needing clarification so that she didn’t embarrass herself if she had heard Ali wrong.

Ali rolled her eyes at Ashlyn’s complete astonishment. “I am attracted to women, Ash,” she explained in the most clear-cut way she knew how.

“Really?” she asked in response, her heart soaring at the new implications.

“Really,” Ali replied with so much confidence that Ashlyn couldn’t help but believe her wholeheartedly.

“Welcome to the club,” Ashlyn replied with a big grin and pulled the defender into her arms. Though she had something to confess as well, she didn’t want to ruin Ali’s moment. She just wanted her to feel supported and loved.

Ali rolled her eyes again and playfully smacked the blonde after pushing back from the hug. “There’s…there’s something else I need to tell you too,” she added and Ashlyn could suddenly see that the confidence was gone. She seemed timid, afraid almost to share the next part and from the way she wouldn’t meet her eyes, she was almost afraid of what Ali had to say.

“What is it, Alex?” she asked, her voice as comforting as she could manage and she squeezed her hand reassuringly even though her own throat felt like it was constricting.

“I think I like…” she began, but a sudden pounding on the van windows jerked both of them from their intense eye contact.

“KRIEGS!” shouted Pinoe as she yanked the van door open and pulled Ali out of it, completely unaware of the intimate conversation the two were having. “Don’t hog my girl, Harris,” she playfully chided before throwing her arm around Ali’s shoulder and leading her towards the group of girls that had gathered in the parking lot to greet her.

It was all Ashlyn could do to catch the apologetic look that Ali shot her before she walked around and grabbed the brunette’s suitcase out of the van and followed after the horde of unruly women making their way into the lobby.


	2. Going To Do It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Glad to see you guys are excited for this one!!! Here's the last update for today.

Team dinner is always an exciting time. Often at tournaments and camps they’re given per diem money and girls branch out in smaller groups based on when they’re hungry or what they want or even just who they want to catch up with or spend some extra time with. _Team_ dinner though, was a time for everyone to be together. It didn’t matter if girls were tired or just wanted a lazy night in, it didn’t matter that they didn’t want to go somewhere nice because they honestly didn’t want to get out of their U.S. Soccer Issued sweats and it definitely didn’t matter if you had a craving for sushi or Thai or really just wanted a light dinner at the bistro down the street from the hotel. Everyone was expected to attend.

Ashlyn usually loved team dinner. She loved when everyone would get dressed up in one of the few nice outfits they crammed into their already stuffed suitcases and pile into the team vans or strut down the street in a mass of giggly, obnoxious women to head to a fancy restaurant that they all knew was going to serve them top of the line food. It was time to catch up with everyone, to hear Pinoe cracking jokes about dating someone who played for Australia right after they beat them and for Syd and Alex to recount their trip to Hawaii that involved jumping off a cliff into the crystal blue water below –“I wish we could have seen Tom’s face when he watched the video” they would say in unison, the team bursting out in laughter as they too pictured what the usually smiling man’s face would have looked like had he seen his two star forwards hurling themselves off the sheer rock face. And then someone like Carli would interject because she was never one to share details about her personal life, but it would usually relate to some golf tournament or new fitness test she learned and everyone would groan and look to the next source of entertainment. 

Ashlyn was often a sense of that sought entertainment. Kind, good natured, but wild and rebellious, the blonde usually had hilarious stories stretching back from her childhood all the way up to the antics she was getting herself into during the WPS and now the NWSL. The Washington Spirit organization she found herself allocated to was a young team and the blonde keeper had endless stories about the rookies that were drafted. The majority of her stories though, gravitated to her off the field antics. It was something that she was usually called out on and until today, didn’t actually mind and would just laugh and shrug off. 

“Did you finally pick a chick or are you still surveying _all_ the inventory, Harris?” Pinoe would yell out from across the table, and Ashlyn would usually smirk and just shake her head in disbelief, her middle finger rising in the pixie cut blonde’s direction before she went back to her conversation with whomever she was speaking to before the outburst. When that question came that night, though, Ashlyn didn’t smirk. In fact, she felt embarrassment course through her veins, her cheeks turned a bit red and she glared hard at Pinoe, mumbling a “fuck you” offhandedly before dropping her eyes back to the table while wishing she could disappear.

Team dinner was something that Ashlyn usually loved, but tonight, even though they were in a top LA restaurant that was fancy enough for the wait staff to put the napkins on your lap for you, it was anything but enjoyable. After Pinoe’s glaring question and her uncharacteristic answer, Ashlyn lifted her eyes from the empty dinner plate before her to search out Ali and see if she had been listening. Luckily, she hadn’t even noticed, and while that normally would have solved the anxiousness and embarrassment that was bubbling up in her stomach around the sixteen ounce herb encrusted filet mignon she had just devoured, she was now feeling something of an entirely different nature as she studied the defender from across the table. Nothing seemed to make sense now as she watched Ali and Hope in a deep discussion, acting like the rest of the world didn’t exist.

The sight made her insides twist and her heart clench. That’s how Ashlyn usually was with Ali at team dinners. They would post up on the corner of a table and while they would still interact with their other teammates, they would inevitably drift off into their own little world. Ali would lean in closer and tell her about the guys she had been talking to in Germany and how they never worked out and Ashlyn would tell her that the right person would come around in time, all the while praying that Ali would realize the right person was already staring her in the eyes. And then Ashlyn would talk her about her family, about how grandma was still knitting up a storm of scarves they’d never need in Florida and that Chris was doing well and working again and how she took her parents out for a nice dinner when she was in Satellite Beach earlier in the month. Their conversation would become intimate and solely between themselves and before they knew it, their teammates were shooting knowing looks to each other before napkins begun to get tossed at them and their neighbors would flick them to bring them back into the present. Tonight was different though and Ashlyn quickly realized it had been from the start.

Normally they gravitated to each other and where one sat down, their teammates would automatically leave a seat for the other to slip into. Tonight when they slipped into the back room of the Los Angeles restaurant though, Ali had already found her seat next to HAO and her eyes didn’t even bother searching the room for Ashlyn before Hope had plopped down into the seat next to her. At first they had been a part of the group, but then they leaned in closer and their voices lowered. They were too close, talking too intimately and Hope’s hand was lingering on the back of Ali’s chair too long. The room felt like it was spinning and she was struggling to catch her breath. It was all too much for Ashlyn who quickly downed the rest of her glass of wine and slipped away to the bathroom.

Once in the secluded one stall bathroom away from the chaos, from the rambunctious group of laughing, talking, chirping women, she leaned her back against the black tiled bathroom wall. Her head hit the wall as well when she threw it back in frustration and took a deep, settling breath. _Was she reading too much into this? Was this what Ali really wanted to tell her about? Her and…Hope?_ Ashlyn quickly shook her head knowing that it couldn’t be the case. Ali and Hope barely knew each other off the pitch and Hope had just gotten out of a long term relationship. Plus, Ali surely would have mentioned something about this, wouldn’t she?

Her mind drifted back to the short time they had together in the van before the girls had swooped in and pulled Ali away from her. It felt natural, even more so than normal when they were together. Ali found her more often out of the corner of her eye, thinking she was being sneaky though Ashlyn caught her every time. The defender’s hand lingered longer on the blonde’s thigh and if Ashlyn wasn’t mistaken she was flirting with her more so than ever. No. She shook her head and the thoughts of Ali and Hope out of them and splashed some cold water on her face. “Get it together, Harris,” she mumbled to herself in the polished mirror as she bent over the gray granite counter and watched the droplets of water drip down her face. She let out a deep sigh before toweling off and then tugged the thick wooden door to the bathroom open and made her way back to the table.

By the time she got back, the table had cleared out. Empty plates, black silk napkins and silver utensils littered the white table cloth. Everyone was standing and gathering their things while carrying on conversations from dinner and Ashlyn smiled widely when she saw that Hope had moved on to Carli and Ali was turned and talking excitedly with HAO instead. She went to make her way over to the brunette when she felt a hand close around her arm and looked back into the hopeful eyes of her best friends.

“So…” Whit said expectantly as Tobin sidled up on her other side and slung her arm around her shoulder loosely. Ashlyn shook her head at the fact that Tobin thought a flannel constituted as acceptable attire for the restaurant, but then again the girl’s laid back, surfer chick vibe was what had originally pulled her to the middie during their time at UNC.

“So what…” Ashlyn casually replied, knowing the game they were getting to as they walked outside to the street piled into the white team van that was pulled up along the curb waiting for them. They were the last ones out and got pushed into the back of a van which had Pinoe, Abby, Syd and Alex posted up in the front rows. The last glimpse she caught of Ali before climbing over the row of benches to the back of the van, was of her slipping into the smaller van with HAO, that Hope had just gone into moments before.

Whitney glared at her as she scooted onto Ashlyn’s lap and sprawled her legs across her and Tobin to get more comfortable. She ignored Ash’s eye roll at the diva move and just stared back at her hard. “So what did Kriegs say?” she whispered, trying to keep the others from getting in on the conversation. Everyone on the team with any sort of gaydar could tell that Ashlyn had it hard for Ali, the last thing she needed was to put a match to the tinder of the rumor by letting it slip that Ali may feel something back.

Thankfully, the front of the van was in a very heated argument about Champions League matchups and was paying them no attention. Ashlyn sighed and looked out the window at the passing buildings as she tried to sort everything out. “It’s not really my place to say,” she began, playfully smacking Whit and then Tobin when they let out long, frustrated groans. “But,” she continued, dragging out the word for emphasis to draw them back in, “I got half of what I was expecting out of her.” The cryptic words were enough to make Whit grin and elbow Tobin excitedly. Both women bounced excitedly in their seats and clapped, smacking Ash playfully until Abby yelled out from the front passenger seat.

“Hey! Chapel Hill squad in the back! What’s so damn exciting?” the taller woman called out, her booming voice and piercing stare through the rear view mirror easily cutting through everything else in the van which quickly became silent.

Ashlyn just threw her hands up in defense. “I’m…I’m getting a puppy!” she quickly lied, and Abby just rolled her eyes mumbling about how easily excited UNC girls are before everyone returned to their own conversations.

When they finally pulled up at the team hotel, Ashlyn scampered out of the back seat, uttering apologies as she leapt over Pinoe and all but kicked Sydney in the gut in her attempted escape. She was dying to know what Ali had to tell her earlier in the van and she was desperate to catch the defender for some alone time before someone else got to her first. “Hold the elevator!” she yelled, her heart racing as she tried to rush to the elevator with Kelley and some of the younger girls in it, but it was too late. They laughed and just shrugged, while the doors closed and took them up to the team floor.

“Fuck!” she grumbled as she sent Ali a text that she hoped she would read before agreeing to plans with anyone else. Unwilling to wait for the elevator to go all the way up to the 12th floor and then come all the way back down, she decided to head for the stairs. Yanking the metal door open, she ran up the stairs. She took two at a time, grumbling about the extra fitness as her legs burned by the 7th floor, but slowed when she heard voices above her.

“It’s a huge step. How do I know if I’m really ready for this?” she heard a voice ask.

She would know that voice anywhere. It was a voice she had heard over the phone excitedly telling her about a new dress or jacket she bought, a voice she would hear trail off and become raspy with sleep as they Skyped from their respective beds across an ocean –Ali just floating off to sleep in Germany while Ashlyn was waking for a hectic day of training and practice in Washington- and a voice she heard at its deepest darkest moments when she cried in her arms telling her over and over how should couldn’t believe her Olympic dreams were shattered. Of course Ali was taking the stairs. Ashlyn slapped her head realizing how stupid she was to forget the defender hated elevators and she slowly crept after them, trying not to let them get too far ahead.

“I think you’ll know, Kriegs,” a voice she recognized as HAO, replied. “You’ll just feel it you know?” 

Ashlyn heard Ali sigh as they continued to climb the stairs. “But what if I get hurt?”

“We all get hurt, Kriegs. Doesn’t mean that it’s not worth the try, right?” HAO replied and Ashlyn began to feel her heart rate pick up as she eavesdropped on the conversation for another flight of stairs.

They walked in silence for a moment before Ali spoke again. “I mean I guess it doesn’t hurt to just go for it right? I just need to talk to her and tell her I’m ready, that this is what I want and I'll do whatever I have to to make it work.”

Ashlyn was grinning as she listened to the heartfelt conversation Ali was having with her best friend. She felt a bit guilty that she was listening to an intimate conversation, but she desperately needed some sign that Ali was now on the same page as her and she was finally starting to get it.

“I think you do. What’s the worst she can say? Just talk to her. I think she’s probably on the same page, but just waiting for you out of respect, Ali,” HAO concluded and playfully elbowed the defender.

From the 10th floor, Ashlyn fist pumped, mentally thanking HAO for advocating for her. While confiding in Ali’s best friend had been a risky move, HAO was also her friend from UNC and one look the prior year from the outside-mid had the blonde spilling out her emotions all over the floor. Now, she was happier than ever that she had let HAO in on how she really felt, not just that she wanted to get into her pants, but that she really had feelings and would do anything for Ali. Even if that anything meant keeping her feelings a secret and loving her from afar.

“Okay. I’m going to do it. I’ll text her and see if we can talk.” Ali took a deep breath and Ash could hear her tapping on her cell phone as HAO pulled the door open. She held her own phone out before her face, her heart frozen in her chest as she waited for the screen to light up with a text from her favorite defender. “Okay,” Ali got out through a deep sigh, her voice becoming quieter as they slipped through the door to the 12th floor. “I’m going to do it, HAO,” she said nervously, her voice shaking. “I’m going to go talk to Hope.”

The door to their floor slammed shut just as Ashlyn crumpled to the floor in disbelief. She was always going to be Number 2.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll just leave that there and pretend I'm not about to be pitchforked and shivved in my sleep ;)


	3. Like The Number One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wellll thennnnn. Things are definitely getting interesting lol. Glad you guys are intrigued by this one. It's going to move fast so here's the next update. I'll just be over here still fearing for my life ;)

The sunlight streaming into her eyes from between the curtains she forget to pull shut the night before woke her before her alarm clock did. It was only 8:00am and team breakfast wasn’t until nine. She contemplated rolling back over and burrowing herself in bed for another half an hour, but decided there was no use. Once she was awake, she could rarely fall back asleep and would usually just get frustrated and throw the sheets off violently and storm to the shower to wake herself up more.

Ashlyn fumbled around with her hand on the nightstand looking for her phone and eventually found it and plucked it from the charger. Her face curled up into a smile when she saw a text from Ali -they always sent each other good morning texts- and she quickly clicked on the message. Her smile fell just as quickly as it had arrived.

**12:22 am: Ali Krieger: Hey sorry I didn’t get back to you earlier. I was talking with Hope about some stuff and didn’t get back to my room until just now. I think you’ll be proud of me! Fill you in at breakfast tomorrow am?**

She slammed her phone down onto the pillow next to her and flipped the sheets off, feeling her breathing become more labored as she felt her mind spinning. _Why had Ali been there so late? What had they been doing that took **that** long?_ The thought actually sickened her and she ran to the bathroom, heaving the contents of her dinner into the crystal clean white toilet. After the contents of her stomach had emptied at the thought of Hope laying a finger on Ali, _her_ Ali, she sat back on her heels and groaned when a sleepy Whitney stumbled into the bathroom with a look of confusion sprawled across her pillow-mark streaked face.

One look at the disheveled blonde’s hazel eyes already brimming with tears told Whitney all she needed and she dropped beside Ash and pulled her into her arms. “It’ll be okay, Ash,” she said, brushing some stray hairs out of the blonde’s face. “We’ll figure this out, okay?” she reiterated, knowing exactly how devastated Ashlyn must be. She and Hope had been friends, Hope like a mentor to her once she realized the blonde who joined camp wasn’t a complete threat, but this was crushing. Being a backup goalkeeper to Hope Solo was hard in itself. Knowing that you were going to be the number two keeper was already a position that took someone completely humble, dedicated and persistent –all of which described the blonde. Ashlyn did it with a determined look and a supportive attitude, easily slipping from her role as Hope’s cheerleader during games to greatest competitor in camps. She had to train, to push the number one to be better while knowing the only shot she had was an injury to the woman ahead of her, to the woman who mentored her and pushed her to be better all the same. But this? Supporting and backing up a woman who had her job _and_ her girl? That was something she wasn’t sure Ashlyn could handle. She wasn’t sure that _anyone_ could handle that.

Eventually, the tears subsided and Ashlyn realized that it was beginning to get later in the morning. “I’m going to shower quick and then can we go down to breakfast early? I want to get out before anyone else comes in. I…I can’t even look at her right now,” she admitted sadly. In reality it should have been no different. Ashlyn had spent years pretending she wasn’t in love with Ali Krieger. She had spent countless times pretending that she didn’t want to lean in and kiss her or intertwine their fingers or tell her how she really felt. Why would this be any different? As the hot, scalding water poured over her tense naked body, she tried to convince herself that it wouldn’t be.

When she got to breakfast, she realized how wrong she was. Just in tune with the great luck she was having, the hotel staff sternly told her breakfast wasn’t ready at 8:45 and that she would have to wait another fifteen minutes for when it was supposed to start. As soon as they opened the doors, she bolted in, practically dragging Whit behind her as she filled her arms with fruit, yogurt and even a small bowl of granola to complete the breakfast parfait she would be building up in the safety of her hotel room. After sticking some spoons and a napkin in her mouth, she turned, running smack into Ali who had also come down early.

“Hey you,” Ali said with the genuine smile that she kept reserved for close friends and family. The same smile that made Ashlyn melt. She seemed happy and lighter and Ashlyn quickly found herself getting lost in the soft brown eyes that searched hers. “Did you get my text?” she asked, dropping her head and voice a bit which Ashlyn easily deciphered as disappointment.

“Oh…uh…” she mumbled through the napkin and utensils crammed in her mouth that Whitney promptly removed when she arrived protectively at her side. “I…my…my phone never got plugged in last night,” she quickly recovered. Her confidence never seemed to waiver, except in the most unfortunate times. This happened to be one of them as she dug her toe into the decorative carpet, unable to meet the questioning eyes of the woman she so deeply loved.

“Well are you staying for breakfast with me, or…” Ali trailed off hopefully, looking out to the empty room that Ashlyn and Whitney were trying to vacate quickly.

Her resolve was crumbling, almost completely dissipating when Ali reached out and touched her arm ever so gently to bring her attention back into focus. It was something so natural between them, to always be touching and she quickly realized that maybe that was just Ali’s nature. She tried to ignore the way the touch set her on fire, the way it sent burning hot lava pulsing through her veins and sucked in a deep breath ready to agree to whatever Ali asked of her. “Yeah…uh…” she began just before a rough arm was thrown around Ali’s shoulder from behind.

“Really glad we talked a bit last night, Kriegs,” Hope said with a crooked grin and winked, patting the defender’s back gently before nodding at Ashlyn and Whitney and making her way into the breakfast room.

_Talked, a bit?_ The words flooded Ashlyn’s brain as she quickly dipped her eyes, unable to watch the interaction, the way Hope and Ali shared a knowing look as if they were keeping the world’s biggest secret. What were they doing for four hours if they only talked _a bit_? She felt her stomach begin to churn again even though there was nothing in it, and before she even had time to shoot Whitney a pleading look, the Californian defender was stepping up to the plate and coming to her aid once again.

“I actually needed to talk to Ash a bit about something,” Whit offered lamely with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Kriegs!” she called out over her shoulder to a thoroughly confused Ali as she dragged a shell shocked Ashlyn off towards the elevators before either had a chance to respond to her statement.

“I can’t,” Ashlyn mumbled as she slumped into the back corner of the elevator before the doors even had a chance to close. “I can’t do this, Whit.” She threw her food down on the floor and dropped her face into her hands already feeling completely devastated and defeated. Her heart had clenched in her chest, each attempt to send blood pumping through her body taking more and more effort. “How the fuck did this even happen?” she yelled, slamming her palm into the padded wall of the hotel elevator.

Whitney picked up the banana and yogurt container, sweeping some of the granola into the cup the blonde had it stored in and sighed as she leaned back on her heels. In all honesty, she could never have seen this coming either. _Ali Krieger and Hope Solo?_ The pair was as strange as they come and she would admit that no one would have called it. “I honestly don’t know, Ash,” she admitted, still quite in shock from it all as well.

“I’m sick of coming in second to Hope fucking Solo!” she grunted, cutting her voice quiet as the elevator arrived on the 12th floor and the doors begun to open. Abby and Carli eyed them skeptically as the two younger girls slunk out of the elevator with half-hearted mumbled ‘good mornings’, but didn’t question them before the elevator closed to take them down to breakfast.

Whit watched as Ashlyn walked over to her bed and flopped face down on top of it. The defeated look of her friend set something off in her and she made her way to the messy, unmade bed and sat down beside her. “Ash, how do you train?” she asked softly, rubbing the blonde’s back to bring her back to the present.

“Huh?” she mumbled into the comforter of the bed that was mashed in her face.

Whitney sighed and rolled her over, trying not to smile at her messy hair or the train of drool at the corner of the blonde’s mouth. “How do you train? Like the number two goalie?” she asked slowly, carefully baiting the blonde.

She shook her head and narrowed her eyes. “Like the number one,” she quickly retorted. “I train like I’m the number one, like I can step in at anytime and keep the game flowing.”

“So even though you know you’re number two, you act like number one? You train and push Hope and fight for the number one spot regardless, right?” Whitney asked, watching Ashlyn’s expression change as she began to catch on. The blonde nodded, her face becoming hardened as the tears ceased falling. “So then why is this Ali thing any different? Just because Hope has something you want, doesn’t mean you still can’t fight for it right?”

Ashlyn grinned mischievously as she sat up and stared at Whit with a smug expression. Maybe she _could_ beat out Hope as number one for _something_.


	4. Tired of Waiting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the plot thickens...also since I know you're all loving this so much and I'm living numbered days right now, I've created a ship name for Ali and Hope. Sooo whose on the Krolo ship?! ;p
> 
> P.S. You guys are getting really creative with the threats here. I'll be sleeping with one eye open!

There was a stiff breeze flowing through the tunnel as Ashlyn sauntered out onto the field. She threw her hand up to shade her eyes as she surveyed the field, thankful that no one was out there yet. Determined to clear her head and come up with a game plan on how to approach Ali, she headed to the only place she knew would offer her refuge; the pitch. Practice didn’t start for a while and she knew that she would have plenty of time out there by herself. After doing some light jogs, she plopped down on the pitch to do some stretching. As she pulled her knee to her chest to stretch her hamstring and glutes, her thoughts drifted. She thought of how her friendship with Ali had started, how it had grown and eventually how it flourished.

 

_“So you’re the infamous Ashlyn Harris,” came a soft voice which caused Ashlyn to lift her head from her phone as she sat on the plush leather couch in the hotel lobby._

_“Depends who’s asking,” she grinned, her eyes tracing every inch of the beautiful brunette before her. She was a few inches shorter, but the way she carried herself with so much poise made her seem taller than she actually was. Her hair was thrown into a messy bun with soft tendrils of hair escaping and framing her rounded face which was adorned with the most beautiful, exuberant smile. Even fresh off of a transatlantic flight she looked gorgeous and Ashlyn fought her hardest from keeping her eyes from dropping down to admire the defender’s lower half. Luckily, a soft pair of amber eyes immediately captivated her and that’s when she knew she was in trouble._

_The brunette studied her for a moment, noting the blonde’s laid back, surfer style and smiled. “Ali Krieger. I just got in from Germany,” she offered, but the young keeper already knew who she was. She had been around the team long enough to hear all about the Penn State alumni turned Frankfurt star and honestly had been anticipating their meeting more than she would care to admit._

_Ashlyn shot her a dimpled smile and nodded. “I know who you are, Krieger,” she playfully teased, but still shook the brunette’s outstretched hand. “Luckily for you, we’re rooming together this camp,” Ashlyn cheesed, trying to set the brunette at ease, but more so trying to build up her own confidence. While it never seemed to falter around women, at least that what her teammates thought, she found herself stuttering over her words and thoughts._

_“And why does that make me lucky?” Ali asked skeptically as she grabbed the extra room key the blonde extended out for her. She crammed it in her back pocket and bent down to pick up her suitcase, smiling when the blonde held out her hand and beat her to it._

_Ashlyn slung the bag over her shoulder with a playful grimace and nodded for the defender to follow. “Well it just so happens that I’m basically the funniest person on the team. And also the prettiest.” She paused and looked Ali up and down once before shaking her head and feigning disappointment. “Scratch that. I was the prettiest, but I think you have that on lock now,” she teased, nudging the defender with her elbow._

_As they walked past the front desk, Ali just laughed and shook her head. This version of Ashlyn Harris was exactly what made her so infamous. “You think you are so slick don’t you,” she quipped, smacking the keeper lightly on the arm._

_“Naw,” Ash shrugged casually. “I just like to have a good time now and again is all. Don’t worry though, I’ve heard all about hard ass Ali Krieger. I know you’re not to be messed with,” she chuckled. She stopped in front of the elevator and hit the UP button, hoping she didn’t just ruin it all when the brunette still hadn’t replied. With butterflies settling in her stomach, she turned and studied the defender, easily picking up on the apprehension written on her face. “What’s wrong?” she asked, concern evident in her voice._

_Ali sighed and flicked her eyes to the elevator. “I uh…I have a fear of elevators,” she quietly admitted, nodding almost imperceptibly to the doors that had just opened up after a shrill ding alerted to their arrival. She expected booming laughter to fill the lobby, but none came and when she opened her eyes again, she was met with empty space._

_“C’mon, princess,” Ashlyn called from her spot down the hall, already heading towards the stairs. “Ten flights is a lot to lug this giant suitcase of yours up so you’re taking me for ice cream tonight!” she said before barging through the door to the cement encased stairwell._

_Ali smiled, before jogging down the hall with her purse and backpack to catch up to the keeper. “You got it,” she said with smirk as she rushed past the blonde. She stopped a few steps up and turned around with a challenging expression that caught Ash off guard. “And don’t ever call me princess again,” she said firmly, before another sweet smile washed across her face and she began singing the latest Beyonce song as they resumed climbing ten flights of stairs._

 

Since that first camp which involved too many late nights talks, too many secret ice cream trips and far too much laughter and playful banter for two people that had just met, they had forged an unbreakable friendship. Ali had been there for her when she was cut from the 2011 World Cup team, holding her in her arms and telling her that her time was coming. And Ashlyn had dropped everything to meet her in D.C. when the brunette had torn her ACL. They were each other’s best friends, deepest confidants and the first person they called when something amazing happened. It was a unique relationship that they had established and it hurt that the one person she always turned to in her time of need, was the exact person she couldn’t.

Half an hour later, as her mind was split between focusing on long ball distribution and the night Ali had called her ecstatic about being cleared to practice again after her surgery a few months back, she heard laughter from the tunnel. Familiar laughter and she turned to see Ali walking out of the tunnel with HAO and Syd and a smile instantly spread across her face, an inevitable reaction to the defender appearing in her sight that never went unmissed by her teammates.

“Hey, Ash!” Syd called, signaling for the keeper to send her a ball which the blonde effortlessly did and hollered when Syd brought it down right at her foot with one touch.

“Looking good, Leroux!” she chirped before sending a weak smile in Ali’s direction, her smile growing when Ali shot her a wave and her signature brilliant smile. She didn’t know why, but it felt like when they first met again; she was nervous, her legs felt like jelly and unable to form words, she was forced to just smile weakly before turning away and hoping Ali didn’t notice how red her cheeks were. “Get it together,” she mumbled to herself, smacking her gloved hands together to get pumped up for practice.

Thankfully more girls streamed onto the field so by the time she walked back to the benches to grab some water and rest a bit before practice started, Ali had already been wrapped up in a conversation with some of the other defender’s. She wordlessly plopped down on the bench to start taping her wrists in preparation to take shots, missing how Ali’s eyes were searching the group for her.

Two hours later, she was strongly regretting the fact that she had showed up an hour early for extra training. Her legs were on fire and lungs screaming for air and she honestly just needed to get a drink and some ice on her slightly throbbing shoulder. Thankfully, Jill blew the whistle and the team went their separate ways for the post practice recovery. Some immediately began to cool down, others flocked to the water bottles while others still hadn’t had enough and got with coaches for some extra training. Ashlyn plopped onto the ground, pleased with her stellar performance on the day, but utterly exhausted.

After lying on the field for a while catching her breath and pretending to stretch, she pulled herself together for a light cool down and some actual stretching before heading into the locker room. Most of the team had already headed back to the hotel and she quickly stripped and slipped into the shower after hanging her towel on the railing. She heard the door open and close, not thinking much of it until she heard a few voices echoing through the mostly empty room.

“Did you see Kriegs today? Damn she looked so good out there,” said a voice that was unmistakably Hope’s.

There was some shuffling, the opening and closing of lockers and the tossing of ice bags into the garbage can before the voices became audible again. “You really think it’s a good idea to go down that path, Hope?” Carli asked, and Ashlyn groaned wondering how many awkward conversations she was going to have to sit through. As if she wasn’t being tortured enough just by the thought of them together, she had to keep having her face rubbed in it.

“Have you seen the girl, Carli? Do you not see those legs?” Hope reiterated. “I know you’re not blind, Lloyd.”

There was a sarcastic laugh, one that often left Carli Lloyd’s mouth, before she answered. “Yeah I know, Hope, but to tell Jill? That’s a big step, let alone risk.”

_They’re fucking telling Jill?_ Ashlyn felt her throat catch in her throat. Ali hadn’t even come out to the team yet and she was already going to Jill about her relationship or whatever was going on with Hope? The room which was already foggy from the steaming shower was becoming more blurry and Ashlyn just dropped her head against the stone wall of the shower, wishing she was anywhere but in the locker room listening to this conversation.

“She’s ready, Carli. We talked a lot while she was back in Germany and we just want to go about this the right way. She’s ready and I’m ready and we’re tired of waiting. I don’t really care what Jill says, or anyone for that matter. You really think Jill will resent it?” she asked, her voice sounding, to Ashlyn, nervous for the first time and it made her stomach churn in dismay.

“You’re both adults,” Carli replied with a shrug. “She’ll obviously have her own opinions on the matter, but if you think that’s what’s best than tell her.”

“She’s a fucking stud. I want her and it’s worth sticking my neck out,” Hope said with a grin before beginning to strip her clothes off as the center-mid shook her head and told her she would meet her back at the hotel before heading out to lunch.

Ashlyn had heard enough and honestly felt like she was going to vomit, again. She turned the water off, ripped her towel off the rack and quickly wrapped it around her body once she stepped out of the shower and onto the cool tile floor.

She heard footsteps approaching and the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end when she felt a rough hand slap her bare back. “Hell of a training you had out there today, Harris,” Hope said genuinely, patting the keepers uninjured shoulder for emphasis to congratulate her on a good performance. “Seems like you really want something I’ve got,” she teased, knowing that they were comfortable enough to joke around, but not knowing Ashlyn would take deeper offense to the words on this particular day. It was something they joked about often, Ashlyn always teasing Hope after a superb save that she was coming for her top spot or Hope making a valiant diving save and turning to wink challengingly at Ashlyn. That was the confidence that keepers needed to have and it was the aggressive, competitive nature they shared which drove them _all_ to get better.

This time, it felt different though. Ashlyn read the tone, the words and the smug smirk on Hope’s face -which she took personally- and just exhaled exasperatedly. She was not in the mood for the bullshit, especially after the conversation she had just overheard. “Yup. You nailed it, Hope. I’ll always be number fucking two,” she said with a bit of bite before brushing roughly by the older keeper on her way to the her locker.


	5. Just Relax

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Leaves this here. Retreats immediately to self-constructed bomb shelter.*

The rest of the day, Ashlyn felt sick to her stomach. The words kept playing over in her mind and she deciphered them for any other possible meaning, but came up with nothing. Of course Ali would immediately want to tell Jill. She defined the word professional and if she thought a relationship between players was something that could cause any contention, she would want to address it right away. It stung, that Ali still hadn’t spoken to her about it all, but then remembered what happened when she first came out and how guarded she had been as well.

She kept the conversation she overheard between Carli and Hope to herself, but it was slowly eating away at her. The thought of Ali and Hope together was completely unsettling and she felt like she lost something, even though Ali had never been hers to begin with. Still, it felt like some strange shift in the universe had occurred and her mind became foggy trying to process it all. She was sulking in her dimly lit hotel room after practice, wrapped in the starched hotel sheets when her phone vibrated. With a sigh, she rolled over, the warm sheets sticking to her bare, sweaty skin which reminded her that she should have turned the air conditioning up, and rummaged through the mess of covers to find her phone.

It was a text from Ali and just the sight of her name made her heart clench. She didn’t know how it happened, but the last two days she felt so distant from the defender even though seemingly nothing had changed. They were still best friends and technically that’s all they ever were, but something still felt different between them. It seemed like Ali was dancing around her, almost avoiding her even though it was obvious she had something to say. They were like nervous school kids acting nervous while feeling out a crush, but Ashlyn knew that wasn’t the case this time.

After a moment debating whether or not to read the message which could further ruin the rest of her day or just ignore it in return to a nap, she clicked on the message. Of course she clicked on the message. It was Ali. She always would.

**Ali: So I bailed last night and you bailed at breakfast this morning. We’re talking later today whether you like it or not, Harris!**

She let out a deep exhale, wondering how a text that would normally make her smirk and roll her eyes at Ali’s demanding nature, now made her heart physically quicken and her palms start sweating. She quickly responded, asking Ali what her plans were for the rest of the day and held her breath hoping she didn’t mention anything about Hope.

**Ali: Well I’m out shopping now and was going to grab dinner with Alex, but Pinoe and Abby are organizing a bonfire later. I was thinking maybe we could hang there and sneak away for that chat? I really need to talk to my best friend right now.**

_Best friend._ The word that Ashlyn usually wore proudly on her sleeve, now made her insides churn. She was about to melt back into her own little pity party, but Whit’s words again resonated through her. She had to fight for Ali. Just because something was going on between her and Hope, didn’t mean that Ali felt nothing towards her. She couldn’t deny that the way Ali looked at her when she picked her up from the airport had been different, deeper and more intimate and until Ali told her no, told her straight up that she wasn’t interested, she was going to fight for her. Hope Solo might have the title of best goalkeeper in the world, but that didn’t mean she was going to claim the title of being Ali Krieger’s girlfriend. That was something she was going to fight just as hard, if not harder for.

With a smirk, she typed out a flirty response about being sad she missed out on Ali trying on all those outfits while she was out shopping with a strategically placed wink emoji, and then tossed her phone back down on the bed beside her as she drifted off into more restless sleep.

A few hours later, she was awoken from her peaceful slumber by a pillow hitting her in the back of the head. She jerked awake and instantly let out a groan when the cool air of the hotel hit her bare skin. A glance to her right to see a smiling Whit made her instantly glad she had at least kept her sports bra on when flopping into bed after practice. Whit had seen her naked plenty before, but it still made things a bit awkward when the nakedness occurred outside of the locker room. She hummed out her feelings of disapproval at having been awoken which was followed by a snicker from her friend.

“Get up, Harris,” she said, tossing the pillow back down on the bed beside Ashlyn’s head. “I brought some dinner back for you since you didn’t answer any of my texts.”

Ashlyn’s eyes went wide and she jerked into a sitting up position when she realized she must have been more exhausted than she thought and slept longer than intended. Usually she set an alarm, but this time she had been so caught up in her thoughts that she thought falling asleep would never actually happen.

She was hit in the face with a cutoff that Whit tossed her after setting down their food, but just shot her a playful glare before digging around the bed for her phone again. After a minute of flipping the covers out, she found it and was relieved that the only missed texts were a few from Whit asking about dinner and one from Ali saying that she missed her on the shopping adventure too. She smiled at the fact that Ali missed her and then groaned when she realized how bad she had it.

“What does Miss Krieger want?” Whit asked as she passed Ash a Thai takeout container and plopped down on the bed beside her. She knew the look on Ashlyn’s face too well, the goofy crooked grin that crept across her face when Ali said something cute, and shot her a pointed look.

Ashlyn propped herself up on a pillow and pulled the loose cut-off over her head before grabbing the take out container and carefully opening it. “She wants to get together and talk tonight,” she admitted, her voice holding some uncertainty that Whit easily picked up on.

“That’s good right?” Whit prodded before shoving a forkful of noodles into her mouth.

Ash nodded, clutching her fork tightly in her mouth as she thought about it. “Yeah. I’m just…I’m nervous is all,” she confessed weakly. She crammed a spring roll into her mouth so that she couldn’t be asked a question right away.

Whit processed it for a minute and then set her fork down on the edge of her platter. “You need to get it all out there, Ash,” she replied with a firm voice. “You need to let her know how you feel before this gets even messier. She probably doesn’t even know you’re interested since you’re basically the world’s biggest flirt.”

The blonde’s mind flashed back to what she overheard between Hope and Carli and the conversation she had wanted to keep inside just came tumbling out. She never felt more raw or vulnerable as she confessed to her best friend that it might already be too late. Ali wasn’t the type of girl to go the coach with something if she wasn’t completely sure and Ash felt like she would just be creating a bigger mess if she stepped in.

For a moment, Whit studied her best friend. She noted the hurt look in her eyes and her defeated posture and it was taking a lot to not grab her by the ear and drag her to Ali’s room and lock them in together after dropping the bomb herself. The two belonged together, that was clear to everyone and she exhaled loudly before speaking. “Do it tonight before she goes to Jill. She deserves to know and you deserve that too, Ash,” she said, again firm in her tone as her eyes bored into the blonde keeper. “I’ll go with you to the bonfire, but you better do it, Ash. You’ll regret it forever if you don’t confess how you feel.”

Ashlyn nodded silently and then turned her attention back to her food as her stomach growled loudly. She knew Whitney was right and that she was already regretting not approaching Ali about it earlier. She was used to being cautious and careful with Ali though, never wanting to push her or make her feel uncomfortable because up until two days ago she didn’t even know that Ali was interested in women and actually attainable. They ate silently until they had both finished up their meals and then took some time to get ready to head down to the bonfire. They had the next day off so Ashlyn knew there would be a few drinks consumed and even though Whitney relentlessly teased her about it, she wanted to look good when she talked to Ali.

“You know whatever outfit you wear isn’t going to make a difference, right?” she chuckled as Ashlyn redid her hair, in a bun no less, for the fifth time and then examined it carefully in the mirror.

The blonde shot her a disgruntled look before spraying on one more spritz of her perfume. “You never know,” she retorted with a small smile. “She might look at me and realize there’s really no way she could resist,” she countered with a cocky smirk, feeling more like her confident self, before grabbing her phone from the charger and stuffing it in the back pocket of her black Diesel skinny jeans. “Ready?” she asked, but Whit just raised her eyebrow as if to return the question. “Yes, I’m ready,” she replied to the non-verbal question and did one last glance in the mirror before pulling open the door.

They made their way to the elevator and Ashlyn’s mind was already in overdrive. “Should I…should I talk to her right when I get there, or wait a bit? I…I don’t want either of us to be tipsy though so maybe I should…” she let out a loud exhale as she thought. “Maybe I should just grab her right when I get there and just get it over with. Right?”

Whitney couldn’t help but smile at her flustered friend. Though she knew Ashlyn was nervous, it was such a stark difference to the usually confident goalkeeper she saw and it was a rare sight. “Ash, just do whatever feels natural,” she replied, wrapping an arm around the blonde’s shoulder as they wandered through the lobby.

“I just…I hope there’s not a lot of people there so it’s not awkward. What if it’s too awkward to sneak off? Oh my god and what if Hope is there?” she asked, her voice fluttering with nerves as she rubbed the back of her neck, her eyes wide as she tried to sort it all out in her head.

Whit grabbed her hand and squeezed it. “Ashlyn,” she said in a calming tone, trying not to grin at the adorably flustered blonde. “Relax.”

The words settled into the blonde’s mind and she nodded upon realizing how worked up she was. “I’m rambling aren’t I?” she asked in a child like voice and grimaced when Whit nodded. “Should I…maybe I should have a few drinks first to ya know…relax myself a bit?”

Whitney rolled her eyes as she pulled open the door to the back porch of the hotel. She smiled internally when she realized there was only eight people out there and everyone there would expect nothing less from Ali and Ash than for them to sneak away for a private walk to catch up. It was just what they did every camp.

“Just relax. You got this, Ash,” Whit said. She turned to give Ash an encouraging smile after scanning the crowd sitting around the gas fed stone fireplace, but her reassuring grin dropped when she saw Ashlyn’s shell shocked face and heard the sharp intake of breath as she gasped. Her eyes followed the blonde’s gaze to the teammates surrounding the fire. The soft flicker of the fire contrasting the dark night sky provided just enough light for her to catch the end of the unmistakeable interaction when a smirking Hope pulled back from kissing a grinning Ali, before leaning back in to softly peck her lips once more. “Ash,” she whispered, desperately clawing at the air to grab onto the blonde, but it was too late. Ashlyn was already gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case this isn't enough of an avenue to vent you can find me on tumblr as buffalo1221 ;)


	6. Always Number Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *still hiding in bomb shelter*

“Ashlyn!” Whitney called out as she ran down the street after the retreating goalkeeper. “Ash, stop,” she yelled again as she quickly caught up to the keeper. It wasn’t the first time that she was internally happy for the fact that Ashlyn was a goalkeeper and didn’t quite have the speed or stamina to escape her. It came in handy when Ashlyn pulled a prank like nailing her with a water balloon in college or smashing cake in her face at her own surprise birthday party and she was determined to chase her down and pay, and it also helped in moments like these when the blonde’s flight response kicked in. “Maybe it’s not what you think!” she tried, grabbing the blonde’s arm to halt her when she finally pulled even with her a block from the hotel.

As usual, Ashlyn had picked the most desolate route and they found themselves in an alley behind a row of shops. Though it was slightly creepy in the cover of night, at least it provided some cover from any onlookers.

“What the hell else could that have been, Whit?” she whipped around, startling the defender with the despondent look in her eyes. “Ali didn’t just trip and fall into Hope’s lips,” she snarled, ripping her arm from her friend’s grasp which had weakened once they pulled to a stop. The image was playing over and over in her head and her stomach was twisting in knots.

Whitney knew it was true, that there was really nothing else that could have explained that, but she couldn’t wrap her mind around it. “Well…I still think you should talk to her,” she offered weakly.

“All I want is for her to be happy,” Ashlyn mumbled and sank down onto a sideways rusty barrel behind a small takeout pizza place.

The statement made Whit scoff and she sank down next to Ashlyn on the metal makeshift stool. “You honestly think she’d be happier with Hope than you?” she asked, the sarcasm dripping from her words. “Who are you and what have you done with my best friend Ashlyn?” she asked, turning and poking the keeper as if she was trying to decipher who had overtaken her friend.

“Cut it out, Whit,” Ashlyn said and shrugged her off, but a slight smile crept across her face. “I just…I can’t believe this is happening. Hope? Of all people in this world, she chooses Hope? I didn’t even know Hope was…” her voice trailed off and she dropped her head into her hands. Her chest was constricting, but for some reason the tears weren’t falling. It was almost as if she was too absorbed in shock to really process everything. “I just…Hope?” she said again, the shock still evident in her voice. “Where the fuck did that even come from?” she laughed, but it was cold and forced.

They sat there for a moment in silence, Whit’s arm draped protectively around the blonde’s shoulder before either was able to form words. “Remember that guy Ali dated a few years back?”

“The one whose wife had passed away?” Ash asked for clarification, wondering where this was coming from.

Whit nodded and pulled Ash into her tighter when the keeper rested her tired head on her shoulder. “That’s the one. And then the one before that where the guy was a recovering alcoholic?” She felt Ash nod against her shoulder and continued. “She picks broken people and tries to fix them, Ash. Maybe…maybe that’s what she sees in Hope. We all know the girl has been through the ringer quite a few times.”

The words settled into the space between them and Ashlyn couldn’t deny the truth in them. She had told Ali as much after yet another breakup she was confiding in the keeper about. The brunette could never figure out why things fell apart, but the truth was that after she fixed them, put them back together and made them whole again, she lost interest. “I guess. But she just deserves to be happy, Whit. The world is a better place when she’s smiling and I wanted to be the one that put the smile there. I love her more than I’ve ever loved anyone in my entire life and as scary as that is for me, it still feels so easy with her.”

“Then tell her, Ash. In your attempt to disguise your feelings you haven’t held back from talking about being with other women. Maybe she doesn’t even know how you feel. This is new territory for her, ya know?”

“When did you become a wise lesbian whisperer?” Ashlyn said with a playful eye roll and lifted her head from the defender’s shoulder. “Seriously though,” she chuckled, a bit more humor in it than before as she processed the words.

“What could it hurt?” Whit shrugged, turning her head to level their gaze. Her eyes housed a steely sentiment and Ash was grateful to have her as a best friend and protector.

She let out a deep sigh and dropped her face into her palms again. “Chemistry, the team, my heart, just to name a few,” she rattled off. “If something is going on between Ali and Hope I can’t just jump in the middle of it Whit. I’ve worked my entire life to get to this point, to be on this team. I can’t just throw it away by creating drama on the team. That’s exactly why Ali _wouldn’t_ want to be with me. Soccer has to come first when we’re here and if she’s happy with Hope, then I guess…I guess I just wish her luck and keep being her supportive best friend just like always.”

The sad tone and defeated look written across Ashlyn’s face made Whitney grimace and she dipped her head so the blonde couldn’t catch on. She knew what it would take for Ashlyn to know attaining Ali was even more within reach, only to have it ripped away again. Ever selfless, Ash would be there for Ali though no matter how much it killed her and wouldn’t do anything to put the team in jeopardy as well. Even though it was an off year for major tournaments, the team was in a bright spotlight after the Olympic Gold they brought home from London and she wouldn’t disrupt that. “You’re too good of a person, you know that, right?” Whit said, turning and pulling Ash into a tight hug as she threw both arms around her.

“And look where it gets me,” she mumbles into Whit’s cotton t-shirt. “Always watching Hope Solo have everything I want from the bench.” 

"Just tell me you'll think about telling, Ali? She deserves to hear it too," Whit said cautiously as she pushed the issue a bit more. 

After a minute, she pushed up from the bench and turned to give Whitney her hand. “Sure, Whit. I'll think about it. Come on, let’s head back. I have a bed and a pint of ice cream calling my name.”

Whit looked up at her with a raised eyebrow. “You have ice cream in the room?”

The blonde quickly shook her head and forced a smile. “Nope, you’re buying me some from the little shop in the lobby,” she stated matter of fact and pulled the defender to her feet.

She let out a groan as they slowly made their way back to the hotel. “You’re a pain in my ass. You know that, right, Harris?” she quipped, bumping her shoulder into the keeper’s as they wandered through the crisp LA night down the sidewalk that led back to the hotel.

“You may or may not have told me that before,” Ash responded cheekily, though the usual lightness in her voice was completely gone. Even when cracking jokes, Whit could easily detect the hurt in her voice and it made her own heart clench. Knowing everything Ashlyn had been through in her lifetime just made her even more protective of the keeper and well she didn’t think Ali was necessarily playing games with her best friend, she was curious to know what was going on in her head. “You better not say anything to her, Whit,” Ashlyn said firmly, turning to glare at her as if she had been reading her thoughts and knew exactly where the Californian’s thoughts were at. “I mean it.”

Whitney sighed and nodded though Ashlyn could tell she wasn’t happy about it. Still, she wouldn’t go behind her wishes and just turned and looked away, grabbing the door to the lobby. Ashlyn was glad that Whit at least had the right state of mind to lead them around the front instead of taking the shortcut around the back that would lead them right by the group of girls gathered by the fireplace.

They were waiting for the elevator, Ashlyn’s thought automatically going to the time she had met Ali and sacrificed her tired legs to walk up ten flights of stairs with the defender, when the doors opened and a body smacked straight into her.

“Watch it,” she grumbled before realizing who it was.

Kelley’s eyes were wide and held a childlike excitement that only few girls on the team could still muster, two of which were Rampone’s daughters and her mouth was wide open as if she was in shock. “Where you going, guys?” she asked, her smiley, freckled face turning back and forth between the two girls heading upstairs. She looked more amped than usual and Ashlyn just shrugged in response and brushed past her onto the elevator, not feeling like dealing with her antics at the moment. Kelley’s expression dropped a bit, her brows furrowing before she glanced down at her phone and it quickly lit up again. “You’re missing out, Harris!” she called out in an amused voice, before adding animatedly, “Word on the street is that Kriegs is macking on keepers at the bonfire!”

For some reason the purely innocent look on Kelley’s face as she held up the text to show Ashlyn the picture from the bonfire that Pinoe had just texted her as proof, set the blonde off. “Good for her, Kelley,” she murmured coldly, unable to keep the hurt from her voice, before pushing the door close button and watching the young defender’s face fall as the doors closed, leaving her alone in the lobby.

Whit turned, but knew what she would find before she did. Ashlyn was leaning against the back wall, her fists clenched and eyes glued shut as she tried to still her rapidly heaving chest. “Ash,” she whispered, but was cut off as the blonde held up a hand to silence her.

“Don’t, Whit. Please don’t.” The elevator chimed its arrival on the 12th floor and she brushed past her and headed towards their room. “Always number two, remember?” she said as she opened the door and began to change the outfit she had spent so long perfecting, ignoring the text she just received from Ali asking where she was and why she hadn’t come down to the bonfire yet. She couldn’t even bring herself to text an excuse back, feeling too numb to think about anything but crawling up in her bed. She knew sooner or later she would need to see Ali, to talk about it, but tonight wasn’t going to be that night. She assumed it would be like an ice bath, something completely miserable at first, a feeling that made you want to pull back and run, but in time you adjusted to it and became desensitized to the pain. Maybe in time seeing Ali with Hope would become tolerable, but not at the moment. “At least we have the day off tomorrow so I won’t have to see them,” she grumbled and dropped into bed before wrapping herself tightly in the covers while ignoring the look of sympathy Whitney shot her in response. “Night, Whit. I love you,” she added quietly before flicking her light off and rolling over.


	7. Hogging All the Keepers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These comments seriously have me dying over here in my fallout shelter. Here's a little Kriegs/Ash interaction and some Krolo :)

“I missed you last night,” Ashlyn heard as she crammed a bagel into her mouth. She tried to chew quickly, but really she was thankful for the time it had bought her to formulate some coherent thoughts. She had ignored Ali’s texts all night, eventually turning off her phone and just passing out in bed. There was guilt settling into her stomach, but she couldn’t get the image out of her head. Hope’s smirk. Ali’s goofy grin and giggle when she pulled back. Hope’s fingers brushing her cheek gently. Ali’s lips gently taking Hope’s in her own. The catcalls from teammates who obviously knew and didn’t even have the decency to give her a heads up. It was too much and she squeezed her eyes shut trying to force the image from her mind before turning to face Ali.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bail again. I just really didn’t feel well and just fell asleep,” she offered weakly, sighing thankfully when Whitney sat down on the bench next to her and gave her thigh a reassuring squeeze.

Whit shot Ali a look, studying the brunette who was smiling down at them as she tried to suppress her glare. “Morning, Kriegs,” she said casually before turning back to her breakfast. Against her own wishes, she was adhering to Ashlyn’s request to not interfere in their situation. Although she really wanted to enlighten Ali and give her a piece of her mind, in reality, Ali had technically done nothing wrong. The best friend inside of her hated that Ali was hurting Ashlyn, but the teammate was just glad that Ali seemed happy and acquiesced to Ash’s desire to keep it civil.

Ali thought the two were being odd as she looked between them skeptically. They were polite and acting _almost_ normal, but still something seemed off. Ashlyn was almost ignoring her and she figured she knew why. She doubted it would take long for her to figure it out after her confession in the van and how the last few days had played out. They had both been pushing it off, but she knew sooner or later she would need to be honest with the keeper. Hopefully, Ash would understand her feelings and be able to help her through it because she didn’t think she could live without her best friend by her side. Sinking down in the chair next to Ashlyn, she turned and shot the blonde a soft smile. “You and me, movie date after breakfast. You aren’t bailing on this one,” she said quietly to the blonde, knowing Ashlyn couldn’t come up with an excuse to get out of that. Posting up in the blonde’s bed to watch a movie was their go to activity every camp on an off day and if Ash made an excuse to weasel out of it, then she would really know something was up.

“Oh…uh…” she shot a look a Whit who just keep her eyes trained on her breakfast, leaving Ash to figure it out on her own. Honestly, she was still wishing that Ashlyn would come clean and maybe this movie date would give her just the opportunity. “Um…yeah. Okay,” she finally got out, managing a smile in Ali’s direction. She wanted to kick herself for being so awkward. This was Ali. Ali. She took a deep breath after swallowing a gulp of orange juice. “I could think of nothing else I’d rather do,” she added more confidently this time managing a wink as she heard Whitney snicker beside her. Ali’s cheeks flushed a bit and it was her turn to drop her head down to her plate as she pushed the eggs around on it.

“Harris!” came a voice from the doorway and Ashlyn raised her eyes and glanced across the room to where Tobin and Kelley were prancing into the room. “You’re coming to the beach to surf with us, right?” Kelley asked as she plopped down next to Ash in a chair and bit into a bright red apple. “We need you as our wing woman!”

“Yeah, the ladies all flock to you,” Tobin interjected and elbowed the keeper playfully as she grabbed the apple from Kelley’s hand and sunk her teeth into it.

Ashlyn began to turn a deep shade of red, when Ali came to her rescue. “She’s all mine today, ladies,” she replied with a playfully challenging tone before shoveling a forkful of eggs into her mouth.

“Damn, Kriegs is hogging all the keepers!” Kelley retorted with a wide grin, her eyes going wide when Ali sprayed the other side of the table with remnants of her unchewed bite of eggs. That’s _definitely_ not how Ashlyn was supposed to find out. She cast her eyes to the side, but Ashlyn seemed undisturbed, almost like she already knew. Before she could even respond, the blonde was up out of her seat, Whitney hot on her tail.

“Yeah I’ve uh…I’ve got to clean up my room a bit before you come over,” she stuttered, drawing weird glances from all of her teammates who weren’t used to seeing the keeper so flustered. “See you later, Ali,” she threw over her shoulder as her and Whit quickly exited the room, waving to other girls on their way.

Tobin watched as Ashlyn retreated and smacked Kelley in the back of the head. “Really, Kel?” she glared at the freckled faced defender who just shrugged in innocence. “You need to talk to her, Kriegs,” Tobin said with a firmness in her voice that was usually reserved for referees who made terrible calls against her or her teammates.

“Wh…what? What do you mean?” Ali stammered, feigning innocence, but Tobin just shot her a hard, pointed glare and she dropped her head in shame. She hadn’t meant to keep it from Ashlyn, but she was terrified to see her reaction. She couldn’t lose her. “I’m going to talk to her in a bit,” she finally added with a reluctant tone. “I’m heading up there for a movie so I’ll talk to her, okay?”

Tobin studied Ali, catching her hesitant expression and nodded once she accepted that Ali knew she was serious. “Good. Now Kelley and I are going to find another surfing buddy since you stole ours,” she said, her tone softer as she lightened up the conversation and gave Ali’s shoulder a light squeeze before heading further into the room where other girls had already gathered.

“Anyone want to go surfing!?” she heard Kelley yell out and she just rolled her eyes at the bluntness. As she finished up the last bite of her eggs, she felt someone sink into the chair and immediately knew who it was by the uncharacteristically girly perfume.

“Hey you,” Hope said with a smile as she pulled her plate closer to her and lightly nudged Ali with her shoulder.

Ali smiled back at her as she washed down her eggs with a glass of water. “Hey,” she said, offering a smile in response.

“How are you feeling today?” Hope asked, her voice laden with concern which made Ali smile a bit larger. She had never pegged Hope to be so caring, but she had been the first one by her side after she took a knock at practice the night before, even shooting Carli a glare and telling her to watch it with the tackles. “Lloyd didn’t beat up on you too bad, did she?” she joked before stabbing a strawberry and tucking it into her mouth as she studied Ali’s face.

The brunette shook her head. “Nope. I’m tough, remember?” she joked and Hope playfully rolled her eyes.

“Right our own little warrior,” Hope retorted with a sweet sarcasm as she chewed another piece of fruit. “You still down for lunch later?” she asked, her piercing blue eyes boring into Ali’s with a certain sincerity that few ever reached with the keeper.

Ali took a deep breath, having completely forgotten about her lunch date with Hope. “Oh shit. I promised Ash we could watch a movie after breakfast and we usually just order room service,” she offered somewhat apologetically.

Opposite of what Ali thought would happen, Hope just nodded and shrugged, seemingly unfazed by the forgotten lunch date. It almost made her feel worse for forgetting. “It’s cool. No worries. I suppose I can’t hog you all the time,” she chuckled. “You going to tell her before we talk to Jill?” she asked, again leveling their gaze.

“Of course I am. She’s my best friend, Hope,” she said assuredly.

Hope processed it for a moment with a smile and then nodded. “Good. It’s about time you finally talked to her about everything.” She glanced down at Ali’s plate and saw it was empty. “Well I won’t hold you up,” she said and nodded towards the door. “Enjoy your movie,” she added with an exaggerated smile which made Ali giggle. This was definitely a side of Hope Solo that a few months ago she would never have guessed even existed. While she never had issues with Hope, they were never particularly close. But after Ali’s ACL tear, Hope had reached out to her, trying to boost the brunette’s shaken confidence and Ali had returned the favor when Hope was struggling to free herself from an unhealthy relationship. It hadn’t been the most conventional start to a relationship, but looking back at it, she was glad she had allowed herself to grow closer to the dark haired keeper. She wasn’t quite the steely person everyone thought she was and the warm, goofy smile she was shooting Ali providing more evidence to that fact.

“Alright. I’ll see you later?” she asked, her voice holding a hesitant, yet hopeful tone and Hope nodded.

“Wouldn’t miss it, Krieger,” she winked. Her eyes followed Ali as she stood up and placed her dirty plate in the gray plastic bin, lingering on her until she had fully retreated from the room.

Ali took a few deep breaths as she wandered towards the elevator and tried to compose herself. While she had played the conversation over and over in her head many times, she still wasn’t sure how to approach it. Should she bring it right up and throw it out in the open the minute she got there? Should she feel Ashlyn out since she thought she already had an idea? Should she act like nothing had changed and just see how the day progressed before telling her? Her mind was riddled with thoughts and suddenly she wasn’t certain of anything. The elevator arrived on the 12th floor and her nerves had consumed her thoughts so deeply that she hadn’t even realized that she had gotten on it. She shuffled down the hall, dragging her feet in a desperate attempt to prolong the time she had before coming face to face with the blonde keeper. Stopping in front of the door, she took a few deep, settling breaths.“Get it the fuck together, Krieger,” she mumbled to herself before taking a deep breath and knocking on the door.


	8. Been Keeping Something From You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's one to ponder in your dreams tonight :)

The nerves immediately washed away as soon as Ashlyn opened the door, her hair still thrown in a messy bun and likely still in the clothes she slept in the night before, and pulls her into a tight hug. It’s a comfortable hug even though it felt like Ashlyn was crushing her insides and she exhaledloudly after breathing in her familiar scent confident that no matter what, Ashlyn will always be her best friend. They’ve come through so much to just throw it away.

To Ashlyn the hug made everything resonate even more. All her feelings, all the doubts and insecurities disappeared as soon as Ali melted into the hug, melding their bodies together. She took in a deep breath and held Ali close to her chest, just appreciating the little time together that they’ve been afforded as she thought about how no matter what, she’ll fight to keep Ali in her life in whatever capacity that be. “I’m sorry,” Ashlyn got out in almost a whisper as she pulled back from the hug and then motioned for them to make their way into the room.

Ali followed the blonde into the room with a confused expression. “For what? I feel like I’m the one who needs to be apologizing,” she quickly countered.

“I don’t know. This camp has just been so weird, hasn’t it?” she asked, trying to get some insight into what was going on.

A small laugh escaped Ali’s lips as she sat on the edge of the bed and watched Ashlyn dig through her bag to pull her laptop out. “It really has,” she chuckled, thinking about how different things were as she watched Ashlyn begin scrolling through her computer looking for a movie. “We’re…we’re okay though, right?” she asked, her voice a bit timid as she studied the blonde’s reaction.

Ashlyn sighed, her shoulders slumping a bit. “Yeah, Alex,” she began, turning her attention from the computer to Ali. “You know I’m always here for you. Right?” This wasn’t how she wanted to approach the subject, but she needed to know. She needed to know how Ali felt.

“Ash, I need to tell you something. Well…a few things actually,” she started cautiously and could tell that she had the wide eyed keeper’s attention immediately. Ashlyn’s eyes were searching her, flicking back and forth as they tried to decipher the next words coming out of her mouth. She sucked in a deep breath, trying to find the courage to say the words she knows could destroy their friendship as they knew it. “I’ve been keeping something from you and I need you to know that…”

“MOVIE DAYYYY!” came a screech from the doorway which caused Ali and Ashlyn to jump anxiously as they whipped their heads to see Pinoe traipsing into the room with several girls in tow, all lugging pillows or blankets in with them.

“Pinoe, what the fuck?” Ashlyn grumbled, unable to hide her frustrated tone as she sighed deeply.

The pixie cut blonde recoiled a bit and studied Ashlyn for a moment. “Chill, Harris! Kelley and Tobin said you bailed for a movie and it started raining anyways so we’re crashing,” she said, her eyes flicking to Ali whose face was a rare pale color. She realized maybe they had interrupted something. “Is that okay…” she trailed off while sinking down onto Whit’s bed with Kelley, Syd and Cheney.

“Not a problem,” Ali interjected, though her voice cracked a bit. She felt bad but she was almost thankful for the reprieve from the heaviness that had settled between her and Ashlyn. “We were going to watch on the lap top but we can order something instead,” she supplied, and looked around the blonde’s bed for the remote which she quickly found.

After bantering back and forth for a few minutes about a movie choice and welcoming another four girls in who heard about the team movie and sprawled out on the floor, one of which was Whitney who shot Ash a commiserating smile, Ashlyn finally started the movie. It was a bit chilly in the room so after setting the remote down, she slid under the covers. Twenty minutes in she felt the covers moving next to her and Ali slipped under them as well, quickly getting settled under with the warmth that Ashlyn had built up already. Her heart skipped when she felt a hand brush against her lower thigh accidently, but when she looked down at Ali, the defender just smiled and shrugged before turning back to the movie.

Halfway through the movie, she heard Ali yawn next to her and smirked knowing where this was going next. Like clockwork, the brunette wiggled her way over with sleepy eyes. Even though it was normal behavior, her breath hitched when the defender cuddled into her side. She frantically tried to still her pounding heart that she was sure Ali could see beating through her shirt when she felt her head settle onto her shoulder. It was normal for Ali to do this, but knowing what she knew now, it felt wrong. Well…it felt right, having Ali in her arms always felt right, until she looked around the room and caught the strong glare coming from Whitney.

“Mmm, you’re warm,” Ali mumbled quietly as she snuggled her head further onto her shoulder and got more comfortable and Ash tried not to flinch when she felt the defender’s freezing feet slide across her calf.

“Jesus, your feet are freezing, Ali,” she hissed quietly so as not to disturb the other girls. She was still slightly pissed that no one had told her what was going on with Ali and Hope, although they probably figured Ali had already done it since they _were_ best friends.

Ali just sighed and teasingly pressed them harder into the keeper’s legs for another second making her squirm. “You never cared before,” she mumbled before finally pulling them back.

The commotion between Ali and Ashlyn didn’t catch anyone else’s attention besides Whitney who was becoming more enraged by the second. It was different when Ali was straight and single and acted like this because Ashlyn knew it wouldn’t -no couldn’t- lead anywhere. But now she wasn’t either and she could already see the confusion working its way across Ashlyn’s face as she tried to decipher the situation. She shot the blonde another poignant glare that Ali wasn’t able to see, knowing that they definitely hadn’t had time to talk and set things straight before the others had invaded their movie date.

Ashlyn knew Whit was right. She knew that while technically nothing had changed between them, essentially everything had. Ali couldn’t be kissing Hope one night and snuggling into her the next, no matter how comfortable it felt, or how normal the behavior was for them. “Ali,” she whispered a bit harshly, trying to get the defender’s attention to ask her to go for a walk so they could actually talk. “Alex,” she added more firmly, when the sleepy brunette just hummed into the soft fabric of her shirt in response.

“Is Kriegs in here?” came a voice from the door, and suddenly Ali jerked upright in bed as Hope rounded the corner. The steely eyed keeper surveyed the scene, not oblivious to the fact that Ali had just been snuggled into Ashlyn’s side and sighed. “Jill said she can talk to us later,” she said quietly and with a note of compassion in her voice that Ashlyn had never heard before when she walked over to the bed where the blonde had very quickly separated herself from Ali.

“She wants to talk to you with Paul about something first, Harris,” she said harshly, her eyes boring into the younger blonde keeper with a look that Ashlyn knew contained a hint of malice. When Ashlyn didn’t move at first, still caught off guard that Hope had walked in and seen them cuddling on top of the fact that she and Ali were definitely going to talk to Jill about whatever was going on, she glared harder with an incredulous look, snapping the blonde into action.

“Oh…uh…okay,” she rambled, slipping out from underneath the covers that Ali had already quickly vacated. “I’ll head to her room right now,” she said while quickly slipping into some sweatpants and making herself look a bit more presentable and less like she had just been cuddling with her teammate in bed. She shot Ali an apologetic look for some reason that was returned in kind as she scurried out of the room.

Ali hopped out of the bed following them, determined to steal a quick word with Ash who had seemed distressed by the whole encounter, when an arm slapped down across the door in front of her and halted her attempt. “Don’t you dare fuck with her, Ali,” Whit hissed angrily through clenched teeth with a steely resolve, her eyes tearing through the defender with a fierceness that Ali didn’t know she even possessed.

“What?” she questioned, her brow furrowing as she tried to push her arm away.

“She loves you, Ali,” Whit replied exasperatedly, wondering how the brunette couldn’t see it for herself. More so, she was furious that Ali was going back and forth between the two. It was only going to end up with Ashlyn hurt and she couldn’t bear to witness that again. “Don’t do this to her. Don’t give her false hope.”

The words caught Ali completely off guard and her eyes went wide at the realization. Suddenly it all made sense and she didn’t know how she couldn’t have seen it earlier. She roughly pushed past Whit without a word, her eyes brimming with tears and ran down the hall.

Ashlyn was almost to Jill’s room when a hand clamped down on her shoulder. She turned and meet Hope’s piercing gaze. “Can I offer some advice?” she said, her voice slightly strained. Ashlyn nodded, but tensed a bit as she narrowed her eyes and returned the intense look Hope was already giving her. “Don’t let personal stuff fuck up your game, okay?” she said, her tone challenging to match her gaze. “Take it from me, Harris. Us keepers need to be the most focused. We don’t need to let our own personal shit affect the game. Got it?”

Ashlyn nodded, jerking her arm from Hope’s grip. She knew it was Hope’s subtle, manipulative way to stake claim on Ali and it was taking everything in her not to unleash on the older keeper. “Got it,” she grumbled through gritted teeth before pushing Hope off and knocking on the door to the coach’s room.


	9. Some Best Friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some good news for Ash...we can all be happy now, right?

“You called for me,” Ash said with a sense of confidence she had been lacking all day when she walked into Jill’s room to find her sitting next to the goalkeeper coach Paul on a couch in the suite. Jill gestured to the standalone chair across from them and Ashlyn took her seat and folder her hands in her lap as she looked between both coaches expectantly.

Jill bit her cheek for a moment as she studied the keeper sitting before her. “Do you have any idea where you’re here?” Jill asked, still appearing deep in thought as she visually measured the keeper.

Ashlyn nodded, even though she didn’t know exactly where the coach was going. “To push Hope,” she admitted, her voice firm as she relayed her given role on the team.

The older coach nodded as her eyebrows furrowed, bathing her forehead in a sea of pronounced wrinkles. “Yes,” she hummed and Ashlyn let out a breath that she didn’t even know she had been holding. “There’s a slight issue with that though,” she continued, smiling a bit when the keeper’s forehead now wrinkled in confusion. “You see, Paul told me that yesterday he saw you play at a level that you’ve never reached before.” She paused and Paul nodded for dramatic effect before leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. “I know it’s been a while since you’ve been brought into camp, especially when Tom was the coach, but Paul was very impressed by you. Things are going to be different with me as head coach and as long as players are standing out, I’m going to give them opportunities.”

“Whatever had you motivated yesterday,” Paul interjected in his heavy English accent, leveling their gaze. “If you keep that up, Harris, if you keep reaching that level and even excelling, you’ll be doing more than backing Hope up. Much more,” he finished assuredly and examined the keeper’s response.

Ashlyn’s lips curled up into a smile, but her insides were completely churning. She knows the exact reason she was fired up the day before in practice, the exact reason she had been pushed to that extra level, the level that few people could ever actually reach unless their desperate mental state pushed them to it and she swallowed hard. She was driven by the fact that she couldn’t accept coming in second to Hope anymore, something that she had pretty much assumed was now always going to be the case in both a professional and personal sense. “Oh…wow,” Ash replied, finally finding her words when she realized Jill and Paul were waiting for a response. “Thank you. That really means a lot,” she added, her smile growing as she thought about the implications.

“We’re going to start giving you more time with the starters in practice, Harris,” Jill said, raising an eyebrow as she waited for the keeper to nod in understanding. “I already spoke with Hope just before this, so she knows it’s coming and we’re giving her every opportunity to prepare for the competition as well.”

“Competition?” Ashlyn replied before even thinking, her mind trying to process the coach’s words.

Jill nodded again and uncrossed her legs to lean forward and cut some of the space between them. “For the remainder of camp, these next couple weeks you and Solo will be _competing_ for the number one spot.”

Ashlyn’s eyes went wide as Paul interjected. “And if you keep playing like you did yesterday, it’s going to be a very tight battle, Harris.” He patted her leg with a reassuring smile and then sat back in her seat.

“Wow,” she whispered in shock. She knew she should be sounding confident and self-assured, but after the few days she’s had and that status that Hope had, especially coming off Golden Gloves in the World Cup and Olympics, she was certainly caught off guard. “Thank you so much for this opportunity,” she said excitedly, her eyes glistening the slightest bit as she took a deep breath in. “I promise I won’t make you regret it.”

Jill smiled back at the ecstatic keeper. “The number one keeper will be suiting up in the Brazil games at the end of camp,” she added, letting her know that minutes in high profile games were at stake.

The statement only made Ashlyn even more eager. “Of course. I won’t let you down, Paul,” she said, looking to her coach and mentor who had obviously spoken up for her after what he saw in practice the previous day. “Thank you!” she said again before Jill nodded and excused her from the room.

Ashlyn slipped outside the door and closed it behind her. With a deep exhale, she leaned back against the wall beside it, resting her body weight as she tried to process everything that had just occurred. Her body was literally vibrating with excitement and she thought her heart was going to leap out of her chest. _Number One._ It’s what she had dreamed about since she was a little girl. Taking the field surrounded by her teammates, her second family, and hordes of screaming fans. _Number One._ It was within reach.

She’s pulled from her thoughts by the sound of footsteps approaching and opens her eyes to find Ali and Hope walking side by side towards her, Hope’s arm thrown around Ali’s shoulder. Her smile fell instantly as reality quickly came crashing back in. It’s crazy how the one thing she always wanted now paled in comparison. Given the choice between number ones, she would gladly choose the spot in Ali’s heart over the one on the field. It was a thought that both terrified and angered her.

“Hey, Ash,” Ali said, her voice hesitant and uncertain still after what Whitney had just told her. She tried to level their gaze, but Ash looked everywhere but after one glance at Hope’s concentrated stare in her direction.

“Hey,” she mumbled quietly in response. She honestly had no idea how to act around Hope and Ali when they were apart, and especially not when they were together and she just dropped her eyes back to the floor and clenched her jaw to keep the hurtful words from spilling out.

“How was your meeting with Jill?” Ali asked. The question made Ali’s heart skip a beat since she apparently didn’t have any idea that Jill had just told her she would be competing with Ali’s girlfriend for the number one keeper position. As if this situation could get any messier, Ashlyn thought internally with a chuckle.

Her laugh stopped in her throat when Hope glared at her, reminding her of their earlier interaction. Conflicting emotions swirled throughout her as she tried to decide what approach to take. On one hand, she loved Ali more than she ever thought possible and just wanted to try and win her over, but on the other hand, she almost felt like Ali was toying with her emotions and it was messing with her head which would in effect, mess with her game. There was no way she could keep up normal behavior with Ali if she was dating Hope. It wouldn’t be healthy for anyone, especially judging from the look she had gotten from Hope when she found them cuddling. Her thoughts flashed back to how quickly Ali had peeled herself up in bed which made her jaw clench even tighter in anger. She sighed and finally lifted her gaze to meet Ali’s, rolling her eyes when she saw how Hope was half a step in front of her almost protectively. “Fuck this,” she growled in Hope’s direction, finally meeting her eyes with a firm glare of her own. Ali looked to Hope who just shrugged and kept her gaze locked on the blonde. “You know what? I think Hope can fill you in on this one, Alex,” she said firmly, with an exaggerated wink met to infuriate the older keeper. Without waiting for a response, she pushed through between them to head back to her room with a mumbled, “later” that Ali could easily feel the hurt in.

Thankfully, the girls had finished up the movie and vacated by the time she got back to the room. She sat on the edge of her bed in silence for a while with her face dropped into her palms in frustration, until the door opened and someone walked in. Raising her gaze she saw Whitney enter the room and held her arms out. The defender pulled the keeper into a tight hug without a word spoken between the two. Whitney squeezed her tightly, pulling the blonde’s head into her chest. “She’s giving me a chance to battle Solo for the top spot this camp,” Ash said casually after a few minutes, as she pulled back from the tight embrace, already missing the comfort of her friend’s arms.

“ASH!” Whit exclaimed, excitedly. Her eyes went wide in amazed shock and she squeeze the keeper’s shoulders where her hands were still resting from the hug. “Oh my god! That’s amazing news!”

Ashlyn could see the excitement written across her friend’s face and the selfless love Whit displayed made her heart swell while simultaneously churning her stomach. This is a moment that she should have been sharing with Ali too. Before everything with Hope, in the seclusion of their own rooms, Ali would beam and scream and jump up and down in excitement if she had heard this news. Now, that wasn’t going to be the case and as excited as she was about this opportunity, that fact still stung.

“I’m so happy for you! I’m taking you for ice cream to celebrate!” she added animatedly, her hands doing almost as much talking as her words as she clapped loudly.

“What are we celebrating?” came a soft voice from the doorway.

Ashlyn’s head jerked to the door to see Ali standing there awkwardly as if she was unsure if she was allowed to cross the threshold. With a reassuring pat to the blonde’s shoulder, Whit walked to the door, gestured for Ali to come in, whispering “You better fucking watch it, Kriegs,” into her ear and then quickly saw herself out, pulling the door soundly shut behind her.

“Um…”Ali mumbled, her eyes flicking to the door that had just been slammed closed before turning back towards Ashlyn. “That was…weird…” she added before taking a few more steps into the room as she eyed Ashlyn. Her face was almost stern and the excited smile she had seen before she walked in had already slipped off. It was replaced with a scowl that unsettled Ali.

“Did you get the response you were looking for from Jill?” Ashlyn grilled her, jumping right to the point. Seeing Whit’s excitement for her good news had further pushed her into feeling some anger towards Ali.

Ali’s brow furrowed, but she nodded, taking another step forward. “You knew we were talking to her about that?” she asked, wondering how that had gotten back to Ashlyn so fast. The blonde just nodded in response, her jaw clenched and emotions stilled. “I thought…I thought you would be happy for me, Ash.” Her voice trailed off as a hurt expression spilled across her own face. Ashlyn was supposed to be her best friend, her biggest supporter, but she certainly wasn’t making her feel that way.

“In what world would that make me happy, Alex?” Ash said, finally showing emotion as it exploded from the deepest depths of her core. “Tell me. Please tell me how you dating Hope fucking Solo would make me want to sing happy songs from the top of a god damn mountain!” She stood up, taking in Ali’s wide eyed look of shock, clearly thinking Ashlyn hadn’t picked up on it all. “You know all I want is for you to be happy, but you can’t just fuck with me, Ali. You spend the night kissing her and then you come up all over me in bed the next day, only to jerk away the second she walks into the room? You didn’t even have the decency to tell me what the fuck was going on!” She threw her hands up in the air exasperatedly as she stood up from the bed and took a few steps towards Ali. “Some best friend you are! What are you trying to get out of this? Who even are you?” Her voice was firm as the tears she had kept at bay rolled down her cheeks, encouraged by the furrowed brow stretching across her face. She took a few steps towards the door, shooting Ali one final pained look and when the brunette just looked at her silently with a defeated look, she shook her head disappointedly. “You’re definitely not the person I thought you were, Alex,” she said with a sense of finality before pulling open the door and leaving a shocked Ali standing alone in the room.


	10. Say It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the metaphorical bomb goes off. Happy Thursday everyone!

Ashlyn doesn’t even make it two steps outside the door before she’s met with resistance.

“Nope. Absolutely not,” Whit says firmly, placing her hands on Ashlyn’s shoulders to hold her in place. She can see the tears streaming down the keeper’s face, but knew that one minute alone in a room with Ali wasn’t long enough to sort out the mess they had found themselves in. “Get back in there,” she added, her eyes housing a seriousness Ashlyn rarely saw from the usually bubbly California girl.

“Fuck this, Whit!” she threw her hands up incredulously. “I have nothing else to say and obviously Ali doesn’t either,” she scoffed, shaking her head in disbelief at how quickly things had changed in the matter of two days. Two days ago she thought Ali was going to finally confess feelings for her and now she couldn’t even bare to look at the brunette without feeling her heart shattering.

Whitney sighed but pushed the keeper back towards the door with a light nudge. “I don’t care. You need to talk all of this out, Ash. You two are best friends.”

“Best friends don’t keep secrets like that,” she growled, thrusting her finger angrily towards the door that had just slammed shut behind her. “Best friends don’t start hooking up with your competition behind your back and they sure as hell don’t try to play both sides!” she yelled, her voice rising to a level that was starting to become audible through the doors which caused Whit to clamp her eyes shut and prepare for Abby or Carli to stick their heads out and yell to keep it down, or worse, ask what was wrong. “She didn’t deny it,” she added hotly, her voice dropping low as her eyes burned a hole through the floor, trying her best to hide the hurt. “She didn’t even defend herself or apologize. I know we need to talk, but I just need to get some fresh air, Whit. I…I can’t be in the same room as her right now.”

The defender let out a loud sigh and nodded. She knew how Ashlyn worked and forcing her back into the room when she was that angry was not going to solve their problems. If anything, both of them would end up yelling things they regretted and cause the divide between them to become even larger. “I’m sorry, Ash,” she said softly, switching from assertive to compassionate as she pulled the blonde into a tight hug which Ash easily fell into. “I’m so sorry.”

“You’re the best, Whit,” she mumbled into her sweater, letting her head rest on top of the shorter woman’s shoulder. “Thank you for always having my back.”

Whit pulled back from the hug and looked deep into Ashlyn’s eyes. “Hey, when you kick Solo’s ass and take that starting job, you’ll be the one having my back,” she quipped, smiling when a brief wave of joy flickered through the blonde’s soft hazel irises.

“Damn right,” Ashlyn chuckled, though it was a weak one, and roughly wiped the stray tears away with her sleeve. “Love you,” she said, feeling Whit pat her back reassuringly as she wandered down the hall towards the elevator.

Whitney watched the defeated form of her best and truest friend stroll down the hallway and turn the corner, and her heart rate began picking up. Ashlyn had already been through enough hurt in her life and she didn’t need to suffer anymore at the hand of the person she trusted most in the world. She turned to head into the room to give Ali a piece of her mind, but the defender was already rushing out.

“Where is she?” Ali got out in a flustered tone as her eyes desperately searched the hallway for any sign of the keeper. “Where is Ash?”

“No. No. No,” Whitney replied flatly, shaking her head furiously as she held up her hands in front of her chest to halt Ali. “Just leave her alone right now, Kriegs.”

“I need to talk to her!” Ali replied tersely, trying to take a step by Whit who just stepped in her path and stared back at her.

“You’ve already done enough, Ali,” she said, glaring down at the slightly shorter defender. She wasn’t one for intimidating people, but her discontent for Ali at the moment was pretty strong.

A deep sigh escaped Ali’s chest and the tears began rolling unchecked down her cheeks. “Please, Whit,” she whispered, her voice cracking under the weight of all of her emotions. “I can’t lose her. I need to fix this.”

They stared at each other for a moment, Whitney surveying every inch of Ali’s face to get a read on her. The look she was giving her was one she had seen many times. In a game when a defender made a mistake –let an attacker through, missed a tackle or was out of position- and needed backup, they shared a knowing look on the field. It housed apology, need and a deep, unspoken trust. That was the look written across Ali’s face and with a long exhale, Whit dropped her hands to her sides and took a step back. “Fix it,” she said with a poignant glance to which Ali just replied with a nod and stepped by Whit before jogging down the hall after the keeper.

The doors of the elevator were just closing when Ali slipped in. Her anxiety was already on full blast the second the doors closed behind her, but the menacing look she was getting from Ashlyn made it spike to almost unbearable levels. She wanted to form words, to set everything straight, but her heart was racing and she was having trouble breathing as the emotions from everything overcame her. The words were caught in her throat as she took deep breaths to fight the suffocating feeling and stared helplessly at the blonde, waiting for her to say something, anything to cut the silence that had settled between them. The elevator was at the third floor, almost down to the lobby as Ashlyn just stared blankly at her and she knew when they reached the lobby, she would be gone. With one big gasp, she pulled her hand back and smacked the emergency stop button. The elevator halted and surprisingly, instead of terror at being essentially stuck in an elevator again, Ali felt a surge of energy rip through her body.

“Alex, stop,” Ashlyn said in an annoyed tone as she tried to step by Ali to flip the switch so she could make it to the lobby and escape. “I have nothing else to say to you right now. Just let me go.”

“No,” she said, shaking her head side to side. “This is ridiculous, Ashlyn!” she scoffed and lightly pushed the blonde’s hand away from the switch before stepping in front of it to block her all together. Ashlyn’s eyes narrowed and all Ali could do was let out a disbelieving chuckle as she looked back at the blonde.

The sight of Ali laughing when her own heart was flittering through her body in tiny pieces set Ashlyn off. “You think this is fucking funny, Ali?” Ashlyn questioned hotly, but stepped back. As much as she wanted to get off the elevator, she would never lay a hand on Ali. If this was Whit or Tobin pulling the stunt, they would be wrestling on the floor like sisters fighting for access to the switch, but Ali was different. Ali was always different.

“I do,” Ali nodded and threw her hands up in the air in disbelief. “How did everything become such a mess, Ash?” she sighed and waited for a response.

Ashlyn leaned back against the wall and crossed her arms across her chest. “Probably when you decided to keep something like that from me,” she said, her tone cold and void of the true emotions she was feeling as she watched Ali’s chest rise and fall in slight panic. She wanted to hold her, to calm her and let her off the elevator, but knew if that happened neither would get the answers they were looking for. “Or maybe it was when I had to find out the truth from our teammates.”

“Oh and I’m the only one keeping secrets around here?” Ali retorted incredulously and took a step towards the keeper with a knowing glare. After hearing Whitney’s confession, Ali had initially been shocked, but then became angry. How could Ashlyn judge her for keeping secrets when she was doing the same thing?

The blonde immediately knew Ali was letting on to something and her heart jumped in her chest. “Wha…what do you mean?” she asked, trying her best to play it cool. She quickly pulled her jaw back up and hardened her stare again after gaining her composure.

“You’re mad I kept something from you, but I had to hear about how you really felt from Whit!” she yelled, knowing that this beating around the bush game was never going to get them anywhere. “Jesus, Ashlyn. How long have you loved me?”

Ali’s words and tone were cutting straight through her walls. As mad as she was at Whitney for intervening, there were more important matters at hand. She knew it wouldn’t be long until Ali was able to shatter her protective walls completely just as she done her heart and in a desperate attempt to regain some control of the situation, she clung to her argument. “It doesn’t matter how I feel because I will always be coming in second to Hope fucking Solo.” A booming laugh left Ali’s chest after her confession, which only served to enrage Ashlyn even more. “What the fuck is so funny, Alex?” she spewed angrily, suddenly glad that they were trapped between the second and third floor in a metal box that kept anyone from overhearing the heated, volatile discussion.

“The fact that you think I would ever date Hope Solo, let alone choose her over _you_! In what world would that happen?” Ali yelled in complete disbelief as she threw her hands out wide.

The complete denial on Ali’s part shocked her and she knew she needed to let the defender know just how much she was privy to. “I’m not stupid, Ali! I saw you two deep in conversation at dinner when you’ve never even sat by her before. I heard you talking to HAO in the stairwell about being ready and needing to talk to Hope even if it meant risking being hurt. Then in the showers I heard her talking to Carli about you how good you looked and that you guys were going to Jill about your relationship and then I saw…I saw you two kissing at that stupid bonfire!” She listed them off one by one on her fingers, clearly enunciating her words to mirror her disbelief. “I’ll always be number two so don’t act like it matters that I’m in love with you, Alex! It never did.” It wasn’t until she finished her rant in a defeated tone that she looked up to finally meet Ali’s eyes.

They were dark, her normally light brown orbs turning a deep brown and overtaking the whites of her eyes, but it wasn’t with anger. There was something else written underneath them that she couldn’t decipher and before she got a chance to, she found her back pinned against the elevator wall under Ali’s weight. The brunette’s hands wove into the material just below the collar of her shirt and pulled her chest slightly towards her. “Did you hit your head, Harris?” she questioned, feeling the blonde’s heart racing against her knuckles.

“But, Alex…” she stammered, and swallowed as Ali’s eyes traced over her lips. She tried to still her beating heart and take a deep breath, but Ali was too far into her space, her body weight pushing too firmly into her and her fingers brushing the skin of her neck too gently to even form a coherent sentence. “Hope…” she got out in a ragged breath, wondering how she was finding the will power to not drive Ali into the wall behind them and take her right there. This was everything she had ever wanted, but not the way she wanted it. She wasn’t going to be a girl behind the scenes and no matter how Ali felt, she wasn’t going to start something if she was still involved with Hope. They were competitors, but despite the keeper’s occasional poor attitude, she still respected her.

Ali looked up into her eyes and though they were glossed over with obvious lust, she could still read the hurt and confusion in them. “I’ll ask you this one more time, Ash,” she began softly, pressing her hips more firmly into the blonde’s. She noted how her breath hitched and her eyes closed at the contact with a smirk. “In what world, would I _ever_ be with Hope Solo?”

One look into the brunette’s eyes told Ashlyn everything she needed to know. She could see the apology, the fiery desire and most importantly the love woven into the gold specks of her cinnamon irises. Of course they still needed to talk. They both had questions that needed to be answered and misunderstandings to clear up, but in that moment, she wanted to connect with Ali in a way that words simply could not accomplish.

Ashlyn didn’t immediately answer, but Ali felt her hands slide up to grip her hips, pulling her in tighter and the keeper’s eyes drop down to her lips. “I love you too, Ashlyn,” she whispered and that was it. Those were really the only words Ashlyn needed to hear.

Her hands slipped to the back of Ali’s thighs and hoisted her up, smiling against her lips when the defender instinctively wrapped her legs around her waist as the keeper turned and pinned her against the wall and dropped her hands lower to grip her firm ass. She held her there for a minute, their lips just a hairs width apart as they intimately shared the same breath, waiting to see if either had any hesitation, before Ashlyn leaned forward and finally took Ali’s lips in hers.

Kissing Ali was everything. It was better then she had even imagined and she felt the fire that was building as soon as their lips touched, explode through her body when Ali’s warm, insistent tongue slipped between her lips and into her mouth. Their tongues ran smoothly together for a moment, dancing back and forth between their interlocked lips. Desperately needing something to cling to, Ali’s hands found refuge in the blondes golden locks, weaving through her hair and pulling her in closer as a moan tumbled from her lips.

Ali knew the blonde could feel her heart racing through her shirt, but she didn’t care. This was what she had been dreaming about since she first realized her feelings in Germany and knowing that Ashlyn was hers to have, was so completely invigorating that she wasn’t going to waste any time being embarrassed by how much she wanted this. The blonde would find out soon enough when she discovered the warm wetness pooling between her legs. “I need you,” Ali whispered into her mouth, and the words lighted a new fire in the blonde.

She took a few staggering steps, dizzy from the lust fogging up her mind and the perfect brunette straddling her waist, and flipped the emergency switch, quickly tapping the 12th floor button repeatedly until the elevator began its ascent.

As soon as she saw the elevator was on its way up, a smirk crossed Ali’s lips and she leaned in to kiss the keeper deeply. Every point of contact was burning with a fiery desire and when the doors opened, she was glad that the keeper only pulled her in tighter, running down the hall with their lips still attached as she made quick work of her door even with Ali’s lips attacking her neck with reckless abandon. They spilled into the room, giggling and laughing as Ashlyn dumped Ali on her bed and quickly climbed atop her body, chasing the defender who slid up the bed as she peeled her shirt over her head and tossed it across the room.

“Glad that got sorted out. Don’t mind me. I’ll just be leaving then,” came a shocked voice from beside them and Ashlyn burst out laughing as Ali’s eyes went wide when they found Whit sitting at the desk on the other side of the room. She grabbed her laptop and phone and threw a hoodie over her shoulder before quickly scurrying out of the room and pulling it shut firmly beside her.

Ashlyn dropped her head onto Ali’s flushed collarbone, still chuckling. It wasn’t the first time Whit had caught her mid makeout seeing as they roomed together in college, but she could tell Ali was absolutely mortified. She was thankful for the humorous break in their heated moment though as it allowed her to study the defender. She lifted her head and examined her expression, watching as her eyes darkened after processing everything. “So, me and Hope, huh?” she smirked teasingly, rolling her eyes playfully at the chain of events that had led to that.

“Shut up,” Ashlyn groaned, dropping her head back down on the brunette’s chest in embarrassment. Feeling Ali’s already hard nipple against her lips through her light shirt cut her humiliation short, especially when she felt Ali’s hands slide gently across her bare back as she mapped out every inch of it. The chilling sensation caused her hairs to stand on end as she tried to suppress a shudder.

Ali rose up and placed her lips gently on the keeper’s neck as she pulled Ashlyn down to her and began sucking on her neck. She could feel the blonde’s racing pulse against her lips and made her way slowly up her neck with licks, nips and kisses until her lips were just ghosting over her ear. “Say it,” she heard Ashlyn whisper earnestly as her strong, deft fingers slid underneath her shirt, over her chiseled abs to her breasts which she began massaging lightly. Her lips curled up into a smile knowing exactly what she was asking for. “I love you, Ashlyn,” she responded with all the sincerity she possessed. “You’ll always be my number one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *opens bomb shelter hatch* is it safe to come out now?


	11. Always Been My Number One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Friday!!! This story is all finished up at Chapter 11... See what I did there? ;) I just wanted to thank you all for an amazingly entertaining week! It was fun interacting with you all and if you want you can follow me on tumblr at buffalo1221. Have a great weekend and hope this answers all your questions!

As Ali’s spiking heart rate finally settled she rested her head on the blonde’s chest, feeling the thrumming of her heart beat which even after three years together was unable to hide the excitement she was able to cause. Her fingers slowly dragged up and down the blonde’s torso, tracing her intricate tattoos and then simply drawing mindless patterns of her own creation. She was just enjoying the way Ashlyn’s breath would hitch when she hit a sensitive spot and after a few minutes, she could feel the blonde let out a soft, almost inaudible moan when her fingers ghosted back up the blonde’s legs.

“I can’t believe we did it,” Ashlyn confessed softly into the mess of chestnut hair that was strewn across her chest and neck.

“I can,” Ali replied without a moment of hesitation as her fingers came to rest on the cold metal handing between her girlfriend’s breasts. She ran her pointer finger around the gold circle with intent and smiled into the blonde’s skin before placing a soft kiss where her lips came to rest. “We had the best goalkeeper in the world behind us,” she added, knowing boosting the blonde’s ego was definitely going to pay off later.

Ashlyn chuckled at the brunette’s statement before letting out a long exhale. Her mind drifted to a different place. Ali was always so confident in her abilities, but she couldn’t help thinking back to when everything had been so uncertain. There were times she’d almost quit in college due to her ACL surgery and shoulder surgeries which sidelined her from the national teams. There were heartbreaks and obstacles and times where she never thought she would step out of the darkness and into the light. And quite frankly, without Ali there pushing her to be better and motivating her in ways even the defender wasn’t aware of, she likely wouldn’t be where she was.

“We did, Ash,” Ali added, prodded on by the blonde’s contemplative silence. “And there’s a golden glove sitting on the night stand to prove it,” she quipped, rising up on one elbow to study Ashlyn’s face. She was deep in thought and Ali smiled as she wiped some stray blonde hairs off her forehead glistening with sweat from the previous hour of love making.

A smile cracked across her lips when Ali brought her fingers to her lips. “Well it helped that I had a pretty bad ass backline in front of me,” Ashlyn finally said, tilting her head so that she could get a better view of the brunette.

“We may have helped,” Ali drawled with a coy smile, “but those PK’s didn’t save themselves, Harris.” She finished with a knowing look as she looked into the blonde’s eyes which were glistening with love. “You’re number one,” she added with a wink and stole a quick kiss.

An untamed laugh left Ashlyn’s chest as she rolled her eyes. “You sure that’s not Solo?” she quipped, a mischievous smirk crossing her lips as Ali’s cheeks immediately flushed and she dropped her head back onto the blonde’s chest.

“Must we?” Ali groaned, but she secretly loved it. Had the whole situation not occurred, who knows how long they would have danced around each other. She leaned down and gently pecked the keeper’s lips, but when she went to pull back two strong hands gripped her hips tightly and pulled her so that she was straddling the blonde. Ashlyn deepened the kiss, drawing a moan from Ali when her tongue slipped into her mouth to claim control. She was getting lost in the kiss and began to grind her hips down.

Ashlyn felt the added pressure to her core from Ali’s gyrations and groaned. She quickly flipped their positions in one smooth motion and pinned Ali to the bed. As much as she wanted to take her again right there, she wasn’t ready to let Ali off the hook. “I’m number one, huh?” she asked, hovering her lips just above Ali’s as she pinned her hands above her head. The defender smirked and nodded in response as she lifted her hips up to try and relieve some stress. “Am I a better kisser than Hope?” she asked, sitting back a bit on her heels to study Ali’s face.

A scowl crossed her lips and she tried to wriggle her hands free to smack the blonde, but Ashlyn kept them pinned above her head waiting for an answer. “It was a stupid game of truth or dare, Ashlyn!” she said with a hard glare, knowing the blonde would never let her live down the fact that she made out with her biggest competitor in front of their teammates. “Pinoe’s dare was to make out with the first keeper I saw. Hope got there before you!” she argued and knew the blonde was thoroughly enjoying watching her sweat. “If you weren’t so slow, it would have been you,” she shrugged through it wasn’t visible since her arms were above her head.

“Oh is that how you want to play this?” Ashlyn smirked, grinding her hips down into her girlfriend’s before stilling her movements as she watched frustration flash through her dark features. “That wasn’t the question, Miss Krieger,” she added.

Ali opened her eyes which had been forced closed from the friction of Ashlyn’s hips pushing into her and as they came back into focus, settled on the smirking blonde. “She was alright,” she retorted nonchalantly and watched the smile quickly slip from Ashlyn’s face. “Again that’s all on you, sexy. Not my fault you have no idea how to read a situation and were sulking in your room with Whit.”

Ashlyn sat back on the brunette’s thighs after releasing Ali’s hands. “Well what else was I supposed to think?” she questioned, her mind drifting back to the numerous situations she had misread in just a few short days. “How was I supposed to know you and Hope were going to Jill about getting your starting spot back since you were ready after your ACL tear?”

“Hmmmm,” Ali hummed and tapped her chin. “Talking to me might have helped?” she asked with a raised eyebrow, wishing suddenly that the conversation hadn’t been brought back up.

“Well sorry I thought you were dating my arch nemesis,” Ashlyn chuckled. “The news was a bit upsetting,” she chuckled, easily pushing away any tension that had settled as quickly as it came. “It’s a good thing I didn’t deck her when I thought her telling me not to let personal stuff affect our game was her way of staking claim on you,” she added offhandedly, thinking about how bad that could have been.

 

“You mean when she caught us cuddling and knew you had it bad for me?” Ali teased, reaching up and poking Ashlyn’s cheek until her finger was able to trace the familiar dimple that curled into it when she smiled widely. “She just didn’t want you to fuck up your shot, or the team chemistry.”

Ashlyn nodded and smiled when she felt the brunette’s fingers gently running up and down her thighs in a tantalizingly slow speed, her fingers pressing in harder as she got closer to her throbbing core. “Who know Hope was actually just concerned about my wellbeing,” she chuckled a bit breathlessly with a disbelieving shrug.

“Who knew,” Ali agreed with a sassy eye roll. As mad as she had been at the time that Ashlyn had kept her feelings a secret for so long, she was just glad to finally have her. “To quote your best friend, ‘I’m glad that got sorted out’,” Ali finished with a giggle while the blonde let out a groan. Whitney had never let her live that moment down.

She looked down at the smirking brunette in the hotel bed, wearing nothing but her World Cup Gold Medal, and was suddenly overcome with emotion. It didn’t matter how they began or how they had gotten to that point. She had Ali and that was all that mattered. That was all that really ever mattered. “Say it,” she whispered, looking down at her girlfriend with darkened eyes as she thought of the diamond ring, which almost shone as bright as Ali, tucked into the side pocket of her suitcase.

“You’ve always been my number one,” Ali said with a sexy smile as her fingers wove into the fabric around her girlfriend’s neck and pulled her down so that their naked bodies were melded together, separated only at the point they were joined by their identical gold medals. “Always,” she purred just before the blonde closed the distance between their lips, bringing her into a heated kiss meant to convey every emotion that had come to light.

The gold medals, golden gloves, world titles and victories were remarkable. The fact that she was finally recognized and had endorsement deals being thrown her way and throngs of little girls, and guys, wearing her jersey and screaming her name in the stands was definitely something she had always dreamed of, but it was all fleeting. Eventually, she would hang up her boots and gloves. At some point in time the sponsors would stop calling and HARRIS jerseys worn by fans would be retried and replaced with younger, exuberant players who were already changing the face of the game. But Ali would always be there. Ali would always be her rock, her anchor, her light at the end of the tunnel. _Her number one._


End file.
